IELTS Writing Task 2: Vaccination - Band 9.0 Sample with Full Breakdown
Related guides:
The Prompt
IELTS Writing Task 2 Prompt (Paraphrased)
Some people argue that governments should make vaccination compulsory for all children, while others believe that parents should have the freedom to choose. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Band 9.0 Model Answer
Vaccination: A Collective Responsibility
The contentious issue of mandatory vaccination for children has sparked vigorous debate. While some advocate for parental autonomy, I firmly believe that governments should enforce vaccination policies to protect public health.
On one hand, opponents of compulsory vaccination argue that parents should have the right to make medical decisions for their children. They contend that vaccination may cause adverse side effects, citing rare cases of complications. Additionally, some parents may harbor religious or philosophical objections to vaccination. A 2023 study by Cambridge Assessment English found that 30% of parents in the UK expressed concerns about vaccine safety.
However, the potential risks of vaccination pale in comparison to the dangers of preventable diseases. Compulsory vaccination programs have led to a significant decline in illnesses such as measles and polio. For instance, the World Health Organization reports that global measles cases dropped by 80% between 2000 and 2022 due to widespread vaccination efforts. Moreover, herd immunity protects vulnerable individuals who cannot be vaccinated, such as those with compromised immune systems.
In conclusion, while respecting parental rights is important, the collective benefits of vaccination outweigh individual concerns. Governments should implement and enforce compulsory vaccination policies to safeguard public health and prevent the resurgence of deadly diseases.
Scoring Breakdown
- Task Response (TR): Presents a clear position throughout the response. Presents, extends, and supports main trends, arguments, or points of view. Concludes with a summary that is appropriate to the task.
- Coherence and Cohesion (CC): Uses cohesive devices effectively to manage the flow of information. Paragraphs are logically organized, and ideas are clearly connected.
- Lexical Resource (LR): Uses a wide range of vocabulary with precision. Uses less common lexical items with a degree of sophistication. Uses collocations naturally and appropriately.
- Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): Uses a wide range of complex sentence structures with frequent error-free sentences. Uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms for effect.
Band 8.0 Model Answer
The Vaccination Debate: Balancing Rights and Responsibilities
The issue of mandatory vaccination for children is a complex one, with valid arguments on both sides. While I understand the concerns of those who oppose compulsory vaccination, I believe that the benefits outweigh the risks.
Those who argue against mandatory vaccination often cite concerns about side effects and the right to make personal medical decisions. They believe that parents should have the freedom to choose what is best for their children. Additionally, some people distrust pharmaceutical companies and government policies, leading them to question the safety and necessity of vaccines.
However, the evidence supporting the effectiveness of vaccination is overwhelming. Diseases that were once common, such as smallpox and polio, have been eradicated or significantly reduced thanks to vaccination programs. Furthermore, vaccination not only protects the individual but also contributes to herd immunity, which safeguards those who cannot be vaccinated due to medical reasons.
In my opinion, while it is important to address the concerns of those who oppose mandatory vaccination, the public health benefits make a compelling case for government intervention. Policymakers should work to educate the public about the safety and importance of vaccines, while also ensuring that vaccination programs are accessible and affordable for all.
Scoring Breakdown
- Task Response (TR): Presents a clear position throughout the response. Presents, extends, and supports main trends, arguments, or points of view. Concludes with a summary that is appropriate to the task.
- Coherence and Cohesion (CC): Uses cohesive devices effectively to manage the flow of information. Paragraphs are logically organized, and ideas are clearly connected.
- Lexical Resource (LR): Uses a wide range of vocabulary with some less common lexical items. Uses collocations naturally and appropriately.
- Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): Uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms. Makes frequent error-free sentences with only occasional errors.
Band 7.0 Model Answer
Should Vaccination Be Mandatory?
Some people think that governments should make vaccination compulsory for all children, while others believe that parents should have the freedom to choose. I think that both views have some merit, but I lean towards the idea that vaccination should be mandatory.
On the one hand, those who oppose mandatory vaccination argue that parents should have the right to decide what is best for their children. They believe that vaccination can have side effects and that some vaccines may not be necessary. Additionally, some people have religious or personal beliefs that go against vaccination.
On the other hand, those who support mandatory vaccination point out that it is important for public health. Vaccines can prevent serious diseases and protect not only the individual but also others who cannot be vaccinated. For example, babies who are too young to be vaccinated rely on herd immunity to stay safe.
In conclusion, while I understand the concerns of those who oppose mandatory vaccination, I think that the benefits for public health are more important. Governments should make vaccination compulsory, but they should also ensure that vaccines are safe and that people are informed about their importance.
Scoring Breakdown
- Task Response (TR): Presents a clear position throughout the response. Presents, extends, and supports main trends, arguments, or points of view. Concludes with a summary that is appropriate to the task.
- Coherence and Cohesion (CC): Uses cohesive devices effectively to manage the flow of information. Paragraphs are logically organized, and ideas are clearly connected.
- Lexical Resource (LR): Uses a sufficient range of vocabulary to allow some flexibility and precision. Uses collocations appropriately.
- Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): Uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms. Makes frequent error-free sentences with some errors.
Band 6.0 Model Answer
Vaccination: Yes or No?
Some people say that governments should make vaccination compulsory for all children. Others say that parents should decide. I think that both sides have good points, but I am not sure which one is better.
People who are against mandatory vaccination say that parents should have the right to choose. They think that vaccination can be bad for health and that some vaccines are not needed. Also, some people have different beliefs that do not allow vaccination.
People who are for mandatory vaccination say that it is good for society. Vaccines can stop serious diseases and protect not only the person but also others who cannot be vaccinated. For example, small children who cannot get vaccines need others to be vaccinated to stay safe.
In the end, I think that both sides have good points. Governments should maybe make vaccination compulsory, but they should also make sure that vaccines are safe and that people know about them.
Scoring Breakdown
- Task Response (TR): Presents a position but does not extend or support it fully. The response may be relevant but is limited and may not cover all parts of the task.
- Coherence and Cohesion (CC): Uses some cohesive devices but may not always manage the flow of information effectively. Paragraphs may be logically organized but may lack clear connections between ideas.
- Lexical Resource (LR): Uses a limited range of vocabulary. May make some errors in word choice and collocation.
- Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): Uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms but makes frequent errors. May have issues with tense, agreement, and word order.
Vocabulary Highlights
- Compulsory (adj.): Required by law or regulation. Example: Compulsory vaccination policies have been implemented in many countries.
- Autonomy (n.): The right or condition of self-government. Example: Parental autonomy is a key concern in the vaccination debate.
- Adverse (adj.): Unfavorable or harmful. Example: Some parents worry about the adverse effects of vaccination.
- Enforce (v.): To make sure that something happens or is done. Example: Governments should enforce vaccination policies to protect public health.
- Controversial (adj.): Giving rise or likely to give rise to controversy or public disagreement. Example: The issue of mandatory vaccination is highly controversial.
- Eradicate (v.): To remove or destroy completely. Example: Vaccination programs have helped eradicate diseases like smallpox.
- Herd immunity (n.): The resistance to the spread of a contagious disease within a population that results if a sufficiently high proportion of individuals are immune to the disease. Example: Herd immunity protects vulnerable individuals who cannot be vaccinated.
- Compelling (adj.): Evoking interest, attention, or admiration in a powerfully irresistible way. Example: The evidence supporting vaccination is compelling.
- Accessible (adj.): Easily obtained or used. Example: Vaccination programs should be accessible and affordable for all.
- Sophistication (n.): A high degree of complexity and subtlety. Example: The Band 9.0 answer demonstrates a high level of sophistication in vocabulary and structure.
- Contentious (adj.): Causing or likely to cause an argument; controversial. Example: The issue of mandatory vaccination is contentious.
- Resurgence (n.): An increase or revival after a period of little activity, popularity, or occurrence. Example: Compulsory vaccination can prevent the resurgence of deadly diseases.
- Vigorous (adj.): Strong, forceful, or energetic. Example: The debate over mandatory vaccination has been vigorous.
- Policymakers (n.): People who are responsible for making policies or plans. Example: Policymakers should work to educate the public about vaccination.
- Eradication (n.): The complete destruction or removal of something. Example: The eradication of diseases like polio is a testament to the power of vaccination.
- Vulnerable (adj.): Susceptible to physical or emotional attack or harm. Example: Vaccination protects vulnerable individuals who cannot be vaccinated.
- Pharmaceutical (adj.): Relating to the preparation and use of medicines and drugs. Example: Some people distrust pharmaceutical companies and their products.
- Immunity (n.): The ability of an organism to resist disease by identifying and destroying pathogens or by preventing their growth. Example: Vaccination boosts immunity and protects against disease.
- Preventable (adj.): Able to be prevented. Example: Vaccination can prevent serious and sometimes deadly diseases.
- Compromise (n.): A settlement of differences by mutual concessions. Example: The vaccination debate requires a compromise between individual rights and public health.
Common Mistakes Students Make
- Lack of Clear Position: Students often present both sides of the argument but fail to clearly state their own opinion. This can lead to a lower score in the Task Response criterion.
- Poor Vocabulary Choice: Using basic or repetitive vocabulary can limit the Lexical Resource score. Students should aim to use a wide range of vocabulary, including some less common lexical items.
- Grammatical Errors: Frequent grammatical errors can significantly impact the Grammatical Range and Accuracy score. Students should proofread their work to minimize errors.
- Inadequate Cohesion: Poor use of cohesive devices can make the essay difficult to follow. Students should use a variety of cohesive devices to connect ideas and paragraphs effectively.
- Irrelevant Information: Including irrelevant information or examples can detract from the main argument and lower the Task Response score. Students should ensure that all information is relevant and supports their main points.
Get Your Own Response Scored by AI on English AIdol
Practice makes perfect. Get your own IELTS Writing Task 2 response scored by AI on English AIdol and receive detailed feedback to help you improve your score.
