IELTS Writing Task 2: Vaccination - Band 6.5 Sample with Full Breakdown
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Prompt
> In some countries, governments encourage citizens to get vaccinated against certain diseases. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this policy?
Band 6.5 Sample Answer
Vaccination is a controversial issue in many countries. While some people believe that governments should encourage citizens to get vaccinated, others argue that this is an infringement on personal freedom.
On the one hand, there are several benefits to government-mandated vaccinations. First, they can help prevent the spread of serious diseases. For example, vaccines have been successful in eradicating diseases like smallpox. Second, they can protect those who are unable to get vaccinated, such as people with weakened immune systems. However, there are also drawbacks to this policy. Some people may have religious or personal beliefs that prevent them from getting vaccinated. Additionally, there is a risk of side effects from vaccines, which can be serious in some cases.
In conclusion, while I agree that vaccinations can be beneficial, I believe that governments should not force citizens to get vaccinated. Instead, they should provide education and resources to help people make informed decisions about their health.
Scoring Breakdown
Task Response (TR): 6.0 - Presents a clear position but with some inconsistency in argument development. Supports the main trend with relevant ideas but with some supporting details.
Coherence and Cohesion (CC): 6.5 - Arranges information and ideas logically but with some repetition and lack of clear progression. Uses cohesive devices but with some overuse and some errors.
Lexical Resource (LR): 6.5 - Uses a mix of appropriate and less accurate vocabulary. Attempts to use less common vocabulary but with some errors and lack of sophistication.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): 6.5 - Uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms. Makes frequent grammatical errors but with some complex sentence forms.
Vocabulary Highlights
- Controversial (adj.) - giving rise to debate or dispute.
- Example: The issue of vaccination is highly controversial.
- Mandated (adj.) - required by law.
- Example: The government has mandated vaccinations for schoolchildren.
- Eradicate (v.) - to remove or destroy completely.
- Example: Vaccines have helped to eradicate many deadly diseases.
- Infringement (n.) - an act of breaking or disregarding a law or agreement.
- Example: Some people see mandatory vaccinations as an infringement on their personal freedom.
- Weakened (adj.) - made weaker or less effective.
- Example: People with weakened immune systems are more vulnerable to disease.
- Religious (adj.) - relating to or involving religion.
- Example: Some people have religious beliefs that prevent them from getting vaccinated.
- Personal (adj.) - relating to or affecting a particular person rather than anyone else.
- Example: Everyone has the right to make personal decisions about their health.
- Informed (adj.) - having or showing knowledge of a subject or situation.
- Example: It's important to make informed decisions about vaccination.
- Beneficial (adj.) - resulting in good; helpful.
- Example: Vaccinations can be beneficial for both individuals and society.
- Spread (v.) - to pass or communicate to others.
- Example: Vaccines can help prevent the spread of infectious diseases.
- Prevent (v.) - to stop something from happening or arising.
- Example: Vaccines can prevent serious diseases.
- Protect (v.) - to keep safe from harm or damage.
- Example: Vaccines can protect those who are unable to get vaccinated.
- Side effect (n.) - an unwanted effect of a drug or other medical treatment.
- Example: Some vaccines can have serious side effects.
- Resource (n.) - a stock or supply of money, materials, staff, and other assets that can be drawn on by a person or organization in order to function effectively.
- Example: The government should provide resources to help people make informed decisions about vaccination.
- Education (n.) - the process of receiving or giving systematic instruction, especially at a school or university.
- Example: Education is key to helping people understand the importance of vaccination.
Common Mistakes
- Lack of clear position - Some students fail to present a clear position on the issue, making their argument weak and unclear.
- Overgeneralization - Students often make sweeping statements without providing specific examples or evidence to support them.
- Repetition - Repeating the same ideas or phrases can make the essay seem less coherent and less sophisticated.
- Poor vocabulary choice - Using simple or inappropriate vocabulary can make the essay seem less sophisticated and less engaging.
- Grammatical errors - Making frequent grammatical errors can make the essay difficult to understand and can lower the overall score.
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