IELTS Writing Task 2: Traditional Medicine - Band 8.0 Sample with Full Breakdown
Related guides:
The Prompt
Prompt: Some people believe that traditional medicine is more effective than modern medicine. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Model Answers
Band 6.0 Answer
Sample Answer:
Traditional medicine is better than modern medicine because it uses natural ingredients. Modern medicine has many side effects, while traditional medicine does not. For example, in my country, people use herbs to treat common illnesses. These herbs are safe and have been used for many years. However, modern medicine is faster and can treat serious diseases. In conclusion, both types of medicine have advantages and disadvantages.
Scoring Breakdown:
- Task Response (TR): Presents a position but lacks development. Only one main idea is developed with limited examples.
- Coherence and Cohesion (CC): Ideas are somewhat organized but lack clear progression. Some basic cohesive devices are used.
- Lexical Resource (LR): Limited range of vocabulary with some repetition. Some errors in word choice and collocation.
- Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): Simple sentence forms dominate. Some errors in grammar and punctuation.
Band 7.0 Answer
Sample Answer:
The effectiveness of traditional medicine compared to modern medicine is a contentious issue. While traditional medicine offers natural remedies with fewer side effects, modern medicine provides quicker and more reliable treatments. For instance, acupuncture, a traditional Chinese practice, is effective for pain management but cannot cure serious illnesses like cancer. On the other hand, modern medicines like chemotherapy can treat life-threatening diseases. Therefore, both forms of medicine have their merits and should be used complementarily.
Scoring Breakdown:
- Task Response (TR): Presents a clear position with some development. Relevant examples are provided but lack depth.
- Coherence and Cohesion (CC): Ideas are logically organized with a mix of cohesive devices. Some paragraphs lack clear progression.
- Lexical Resource (LR): Adequate range of vocabulary with some less common lexical items. Some errors in word choice and collocation.
- Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): Mix of simple and complex sentence forms. Some errors in grammar and punctuation.
Band 8.0 Answer
Sample Answer:
The debate surrounding the efficacy of traditional medicine versus modern medicine is multifaceted. While traditional medicine offers natural remedies with minimal side effects, modern medicine provides swift and reliable treatments for a wide range of ailments. For example, traditional Chinese medicine, such as herbal remedies and acupuncture, has been used for centuries to treat various conditions. These remedies are often gentler on the body and can be effective for chronic illnesses. However, modern medicine excels in treating acute and life-threatening conditions. Advanced medical technologies and pharmaceuticals can cure diseases that traditional medicine cannot. Therefore, both forms of medicine have their unique advantages and should be integrated to provide comprehensive healthcare solutions.
Scoring Breakdown:
- Task Response (TR): Presents a clear position with relevant, extended, and supported arguments. Examples are well-chosen and fully developed.
- Coherence and Cohesion (CC): Ideas are logically organized with a clear progression. A mix of cohesive devices is used effectively.
- Lexical Resource (LR): Adequate range of vocabulary with some less common lexical items. Some errors in word choice and collocation.
- Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): Mix of simple and complex sentence forms. Some errors in grammar and punctuation.
Band 9.0 Answer
Sample Answer:
The efficacy of traditional medicine in comparison to modern medicine is a topic of considerable debate. Traditional medicine, with its emphasis on natural remedies and holistic healing, offers several advantages. For instance, traditional practices like Ayurveda and herbal medicine have been used for centuries to treat various ailments with minimal side effects. These remedies often focus on preventing illness and promoting overall well-being. However, modern medicine excels in treating acute and life-threatening conditions. Advanced medical technologies and pharmaceuticals can cure diseases that traditional medicine cannot. Therefore, both forms of medicine have their unique strengths and should be integrated to provide comprehensive healthcare solutions. Governments and healthcare providers should promote the use of both traditional and modern medicine to ensure the best possible outcomes for patients.
Scoring Breakdown:
- Task Response (TR): Presents a clear position with relevant, extended, and supported arguments. Examples are well-chosen and fully developed.
- Coherence and Cohesion (CC): Ideas are logically organized with a clear progression. A mix of cohesive devices is used effectively.
- Lexical Resource (LR): Adequate range of vocabulary with some less common lexical items. Some errors in word choice and collocation.
- Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): Mix of simple and complex sentence forms. Some errors in grammar and punctuation.
Vocabulary Highlights
- Efficacy (noun): The ability to produce a desired result or effect. Example: The efficacy of traditional medicine is well-documented.
- Holistic (adjective): Relating to the treatment of the whole person, considering mental and social factors, rather than just the symptoms of a disease. Example: Traditional medicine often takes a holistic approach to healing.
- Ailments (noun): Illnesses or minor medical conditions. Example: Traditional remedies can treat various ailments effectively.
- Pharmaceuticals (noun): Medicines, drugs, or other preparations for medicinal purposes. Example: Modern pharmaceuticals can cure diseases that traditional medicine cannot.
- Comprehensive (adjective): Including or dealing with all or nearly all aspects of something. Example: A comprehensive healthcare solution should include both traditional and modern medicine.
- Integration (noun): The act of combining or blending into an integral whole. Example: The integration of traditional and modern medicine can provide better healthcare outcomes.
- Preventive (adjective): Intended to keep something from happening. Example: Traditional medicine often focuses on preventive care.
- Acupuncture (noun): A form of traditional Chinese medicine that involves inserting thin needles into the body at specific points. Example: Acupuncture is effective for pain management.
- Herbal (adjective): Relating to or made from herbs. Example: Herbal remedies are often gentler on the body.
- Chronic (adjective): Persisting for a long time or constantly recurring. Example: Traditional medicine can be effective for chronic illnesses.
Common Mistakes Students Make
- Lack of Clear Position: Students often present a weak or unclear position, making it difficult to score well on Task Response.
- Inadequate Examples: Providing irrelevant or insufficient examples can weaken the argument and lower the score.
- Poor Vocabulary Choices: Using repetitive or incorrect vocabulary can negatively impact the Lexical Resource score.
- Grammatical Errors: Frequent grammatical mistakes can lower the Grammatical Range and Accuracy score.
- Lack of Cohesion: Poorly organized ideas with weak transitions can affect the Coherence and Cohesion score.
Get Your Own Response Scored by AI on English AIdol
Practice makes perfect. Get your own IELTS Writing Task 2 response scored by AI on English AIdol and receive detailed feedback to improve your score.
