IELTS Writing Task 2: Student Loans - Band 7.0 Sample with Full Breakdown
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Prompt
Some people argue that student loans should be completely abolished. Others believe that student loans are necessary to ensure access to higher education. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Model Answers
Band 6.0 Answer
Student loans are a controversial issue. Some people think they should be abolished, while others believe they are necessary. In my opinion, student loans have more advantages than disadvantages.
On the one hand, abolishing student loans could make higher education more accessible. Many students come from low-income families and cannot afford tuition fees. Without loans, they would have more opportunities to attend university. Additionally, students would graduate without debt, which could improve their mental health and financial stability.
On the other hand, student loans are necessary for several reasons. First, universities need funding to maintain facilities and hire qualified professors. If loans were abolished, universities might have to increase tuition fees, making education even more expensive. Second, loans allow students to choose their preferred major without worrying about immediate costs. This flexibility is important for personal and professional development.
In conclusion, while abolishing student loans has some benefits, I believe they are necessary to ensure access to quality education and support universities.
Scoring Breakdown
- Task Response (TR): Addresses the task but with limited development. Presents a clear position but lacks depth in discussion.
- Coherence and Cohesion (CC): Information is logically organized but with some repetition and lack of clear progression.
- Lexical Resource (LR): Uses a mix of appropriate and limited vocabulary. Some errors in word choice and collocation.
- Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): Uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms with frequent errors in grammar and punctuation.
Band 7.0 Answer
The debate surrounding student loans is contentious, with proponents advocating for their abolition and opponents supporting their necessity. I firmly believe that student loans play a crucial role in higher education.
Those in favor of abolishing student loans argue that doing so would democratize access to education. According to a report by the Institute for Fiscal Studies, 40% of students from low-income backgrounds rely on loans to finance their studies. Eliminating loans would alleviate the financial burden on these students, allowing them to pursue their academic goals without the stress of debt. Moreover, graduates would enter the workforce with a cleaner financial slate, potentially enhancing their career prospects and overall well-being.
However, abolishing student loans could have unintended consequences. Universities depend on tuition fees to fund infrastructure, research, and faculty salaries. Without loan subsidies, institutions might be forced to raise tuition fees, pricing out even more students. Additionally, loans provide students with the financial flexibility to explore different academic paths. For instance, a student interested in a STEM field might need additional funds for lab equipment or software, which loans can facilitate.
In conclusion, while the abolition of student loans has merit, the potential drawbacks outweigh the benefits. Student loans remain a vital tool for ensuring access to higher education and supporting academic institutions.
Scoring Breakdown
- Task Response (TR): Presents a clear position with some development. Discusses both views but with limited depth in one side.
- Coherence and Cohesion (CC): Information is logically organized with clear progression. Uses a mix of cohesive devices effectively.
- Lexical Resource (LR): Uses a sufficient range of vocabulary with some less common lexical items. Some errors in word choice and collocation.
- Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): Uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms with occasional errors in grammar and punctuation.
Band 8.0 Answer
The contentious issue of student loans has sparked intense debate, with proponents advocating for their abolition and opponents defending their necessity. I contend that student loans are indispensable in the current educational landscape.
Advocates for the abolition of student loans posit that such a measure would democratize access to higher education. According to a comprehensive study by the Brookings Institution, 60% of students from disadvantaged backgrounds rely on loans to finance their studies. The elimination of loans would alleviate the financial burden on these students, enabling them to pursue their academic aspirations without the encumbrance of debt. Furthermore, graduates would enter the job market with a more favorable financial standing, potentially enhancing their career trajectories and overall quality of life.
Conversely, the abolition of student loans could precipitate a myriad of challenges. Universities rely heavily on tuition fees to fund critical aspects such as infrastructure, research, and faculty compensation. Without loan subsidies, educational institutions might be compelled to augment tuition fees, thereby exacerbating the financial barriers to entry. Additionally, loans provide students with the financial latitude to explore diverse academic disciplines. For example, a student aspiring to pursue a degree in the arts might require additional funds for materials or studio space, which loans can readily provide.
In conclusion, while the abolition of student loans presents a compelling argument, the potential ramifications render it an impractical solution. Student loans remain an essential mechanism for ensuring equitable access to higher education and sustaining the viability of academic institutions.
Scoring Breakdown
- Task Response (TR): Presents a clear position with thorough development. Discusses both views with a clear conclusion.
- Coherence and Cohesion (CC): Information is logically organized with clear progression. Uses a wide range of cohesive devices effectively.
- Lexical Resource (LR): Uses a wide range of vocabulary with frequent use of less common lexical items. Some sophisticated vocabulary used appropriately.
- Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): Uses a wide range of complex sentence forms with frequent errors in grammar and punctuation.
Vocabulary Highlights
- Contentious (adj.): Causing or likely to cause disagreement or argument. Example: The issue of student loans is highly contentious.
- Democratize (v.): To make something accessible to everyone. Example: The government aims to democratize education by providing free textbooks.
- Allevate (v.): To make something less severe or intense. Example: The new policy aims to alleviate the financial burden on students.
- Encumbrance (n.): A burden or hindrance. Example: The heavy debt is an encumbrance to his financial freedom.
- Precipitate (v.): To cause something to happen suddenly or unexpectedly. Example: The new policy could precipitate a financial crisis.
- Augment (v.): To make something greater by adding to it. Example: The university plans to augment its facilities with new buildings.
- Exacerbate (v.): To make something worse. Example: The new policy could exacerbate the financial burden on students.
- Latitude (n.): The freedom or scope to act or think as one wishes. Example: The new policy provides students with greater latitude in choosing their majors.
- Aspire (v.): To have a strong desire to achieve something. Example: She aspires to become a doctor and serve her community.
- Trajectory (n.): The path or route followed by something. Example: The new policy aims to improve the career trajectories of graduates.
- Indispensable (adj.): Absolutely necessary. Example: Student loans are indispensable for many students.
- Equitable (adj.): Fair and just. Example: The new policy aims to ensure equitable access to education.
- Viability (n.): The ability to be done or to exist successfully. Example: The new policy aims to ensure the viability of academic institutions.
- Subsidies (n.): Financial assistance provided by the government. Example: The government provides subsidies to make education more affordable.
- Infrastructure (n.): The basic physical and organizational structures needed for the operation of a society. Example: The university is investing in new infrastructure to improve the learning environment.
- Compensation (n.): Payment or rewards for services or loss or injury. Example: The university offers competitive compensation packages to attract top faculty.
- Disadvantaged (adj.): Lacking the necessary resources or opportunities. Example: The new policy aims to support disadvantaged students.
- Trajectories (n.): The path or route followed by something. Example: The new policy aims to improve the career trajectories of graduates.
- Ramifications (n.): The consequences of an action or event. Example: The new policy has significant ramifications for students and universities.
- Mechanism (n.): A process or system designed to serve a specific function. Example: Student loans are a mechanism for ensuring access to higher education.
Common Mistakes Students Make
- Lack of Clear Position: Many students fail to present a clear position on the issue, making their arguments less convincing.
- Insufficient Development: Some students provide a clear position but fail to develop their arguments with sufficient evidence and examples.
- Repetition: Students often repeat the same points without adding new information or perspectives.
- Poor Organization: Some students struggle with organizing their ideas logically, leading to a disjointed and confusing response.
- Grammatical Errors: Frequent grammatical errors can detract from the overall quality of the response and make it difficult to understand.
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