IELTS Writing Task 2: Space Travel - Band 7.0 Sample with Full Breakdown

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The Prompt

Some people think that space travel is a waste of money and the funds should be spent on more important things like education and health. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Model Answers

Band 6.0 Answer

Scored as:

• Task Response: 5.0 (presents a position but with limited development)
• Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0 (uses some cohesive devices but lacks clear progression)
• Lexical Resource: 6.0 (uses some less common vocabulary but with some errors)
• Grammar: 6.0 (uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms but with frequent errors)

Answer:

Space travel is very expensive and some people think that the money should be spent on other things like education and health. I agree with this opinion.

Firstly, education is very important for the future. If we spend more money on education, we can have better schools and teachers. This will help students to learn more and get better jobs. Also, health is important because people need to be healthy to work and live a good life. If we spend more money on health, we can have better hospitals and doctors.

On the other hand, some people say that space travel is important for science and technology. They say that it can help us to find new things and learn more about the universe. However, I think that we already know a lot about the universe and we should spend money on things that help people more directly.

In conclusion, I think that the money spent on space travel should be spent on education and health instead. This will help more people and make the world a better place.

Band 7.0 Answer

Scored as:

• Task Response: 7.0 (presents a clear position with relevant, extended ideas)
• Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0 (uses cohesive devices effectively but with some inconsistencies)
• Lexical Resource: 7.0 (uses a mix of less common and common vocabulary with some errors)
• Grammar: 7.0 (uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms with occasional errors)

Answer:

The debate over whether space travel is a waste of money or not has been ongoing for many years. I firmly believe that the funds allocated for space exploration should be redirected to more pressing issues such as education and health.

To begin with, investing in education can yield significant long-term benefits. By allocating more resources to education, we can improve the quality of teaching and learning, which in turn can lead to a more skilled and knowledgeable workforce. This can drive economic growth and innovation, ultimately benefiting society as a whole. Furthermore, improving health care systems can save lives and enhance the quality of life for many people. With better funding, hospitals can upgrade their facilities, train more medical staff, and provide better services to those in need.

On the other hand, proponents of space travel argue that it is essential for scientific advancement and technological innovation. They contend that exploring space can lead to new discoveries and a better understanding of the universe. While these points are valid, I believe that the immediate needs of humanity, such as education and health, should take precedence. We already have a wealth of knowledge about the universe, and focusing on more pressing issues can have a more direct and positive impact on people's lives.

In conclusion, I strongly believe that the money spent on space travel should be invested in education and health instead. By doing so, we can address more urgent needs and create a better future for everyone.

Band 8.0 Answer

Scored as:

• Task Response: 8.0 (presents a clear position with fully extended ideas and supported arguments)
• Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0 (uses cohesive devices effectively and logically)
• Lexical Resource: 8.0 (uses a wide range of vocabulary with only minor errors)
• Grammar: 8.0 (uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms with only minor errors)

Answer:

The question of whether space travel is a waste of money or a necessary investment has sparked considerable debate. I am of the opinion that the substantial funds allocated to space exploration could be better utilized in addressing more pressing issues such as education and health.

Firstly, education is the cornerstone of societal progress. By redirecting funds from space travel to education, we can enhance the quality of teaching and learning environments. This investment can lead to a more skilled and educated population, which is crucial for economic development and innovation. Moreover, improving health care systems can have a profound impact on the well-being of society. With better funding, health care providers can offer more advanced treatments, train more medical professionals, and ensure that everyone has access to quality health care.

Conversely, advocates for space travel argue that it is vital for scientific discovery and technological advancement. They point out that space exploration has led to numerous innovations that have benefited society, such as advancements in medicine and technology. While these arguments hold merit, I believe that the immediate needs of humanity, such as education and health, should be given higher priority. We already possess a considerable amount of knowledge about the universe, and focusing on more urgent issues can have a more tangible and positive impact on people's lives.

In conclusion, I firmly believe that the money spent on space travel should be invested in education and health instead. By doing so, we can address more critical needs and create a better future for all.

Vocabulary Highlights

1. Allocate (verb) - to distribute something as needed. Example: Funds should be allocated wisely.
2. Yield (verb) - to produce or provide something. Example: Investing in education can yield significant benefits.
3. Proponent (noun) - a person who supports or advocates for something. Example: Proponents of space travel argue for its benefits.
4. Contend (verb) - to assert or maintain something as true. Example: They contend that space travel is essential for scientific advancement.
5. Precedence (noun) - the condition of being considered more important than something else. Example: Education and health should take precedence over space travel.
6. Redirected (verb) - to change the direction or focus of something. Example: Funds should be redirected to more pressing issues.
7. Enhance (verb) - to increase or improve something. Example: Investing in education can enhance the quality of teaching.
8. Profound (adjective) - having deep meaning or significance. Example: Improving health care can have a profound impact on society.
9. Advocates (noun) - people who support or argue for something. Example: Advocates for space travel highlight its benefits.
10. Tangible (adjective) - able to be touched or felt; real and concrete. Example: Addressing urgent issues can have a tangible impact.
11. Substantial (adjective) - large in amount or value. Example: Substantial funds are allocated to space exploration.
12. Cornerstone (noun) - a fundamental part or principle. Example: Education is the cornerstone of societal progress.
13. Enhance (verb) - to increase or improve something. Example: Investing in education can enhance the quality of teaching.
14. Profound (adjective) - having deep meaning or significance. Example: Improving health care can have a profound impact on society.
15. Advocates (noun) - people who support or argue for something. Example: Advocates for space travel highlight its benefits.
16. Tangible (adjective) - able to be touched or felt; real and concrete. Example: Addressing urgent issues can have a tangible impact.
17. Substantial (adjective) - large in amount or value. Example: Substantial funds are allocated to space exploration.
18. Cornerstone (noun) - a fundamental part or principle. Example: Education is the cornerstone of societal progress.

Common Mistakes Students Make

1. Lack of Clear Position: Students often fail to present a clear position on the issue, leading to a lower score in Task Response.
2. Inadequate Development of Ideas: Many students provide only superficial arguments without extending their ideas with relevant examples or explanations.
3. Poor Cohesion and Cohesion: Students sometimes struggle with connecting their ideas logically, resulting in a disjointed essay.
4. Limited Vocabulary: Using only basic vocabulary can limit the Lexical Resource score. Students should aim to use a mix of common and less common vocabulary.
5. Grammar Errors: Frequent grammatical errors can significantly impact the Grammar score. Students should practice using a variety of sentence structures accurately.

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