IELTS Writing Task 2: Smoking In Public — Band 6.5 Sample with Full Breakdown
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Prompt
Some people argue that smoking in public places should be banned. Others believe that people should have the freedom to smoke wherever they want. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Model Answers
Band 6.0 Answer
Smoking in public places is a big problem. Some people think it should be banned, but others say it is a personal choice. I think smoking should not be allowed in public places.
Firstly, smoking in public is bad for health. The smoke can hurt other people, especially children and old people. Also, smoking makes public places dirty. Cigarettes on the ground are ugly and bad for the environment. If smoking is banned, public places will be cleaner and healthier.
However, some people say smoking is a personal choice. They think the government should not tell people what to do. But I disagree. If people want to smoke, they can do it at home or in special places for smokers. This way, everyone can be happy.
In conclusion, smoking in public should be banned. It is bad for health and makes places dirty. The government should make laws to stop smoking in public.
Scoring Breakdown
- Task Response (TR): 5.0 - Presents a clear position but with limited development.
- Coherence and Cohesion (CC): 5.0 - Ideas are logically organized but with some repetition.
- Lexical Resource (LR): 6.0 - Uses a mix of simple and some complex vocabulary.
- Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): 5.0 - Mostly simple sentences with some errors.
Band 6.5 Answer
The issue of smoking in public places has been a topic of debate for many years. While some advocate for a complete ban, others argue for the freedom to smoke wherever one pleases. I believe that smoking should be restricted in public areas.
On one hand, smoking in public places poses significant health risks. Second-hand smoke can cause serious illnesses, particularly for those with respiratory conditions. Additionally, cigarette butts are a major source of litter, polluting our streets and natural environments. By banning smoking in public, we can protect the health of non-smokers and maintain cleaner public spaces.
On the other hand, some people believe that smoking is a personal choice and that individuals should have the freedom to smoke wherever they want. They argue that banning smoking infringes on personal liberties. However, I contend that the rights of non-smokers to live in a healthy environment should take precedence. Designated smoking areas can be created to accommodate smokers without compromising the well-being of others.
In conclusion, while the debate on smoking in public places continues, the health and environmental benefits of a ban outweigh the arguments for personal freedom. Therefore, I strongly support the implementation of stricter regulations on smoking in public areas.
Scoring Breakdown
- Task Response (TR): 6.5 - Presents a clear position with some development.
- Coherence and Cohesion (CC): 6.5 - Ideas are logically organized with some use of cohesive devices.
- Lexical Resource (LR): 6.5 - Uses a mix of simple and complex vocabulary with some repetition.
- Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): 6.5 - Mostly accurate sentences with some errors.
Band 7.0 Answer
The contentious issue of smoking in public places has sparked considerable debate. While some individuals advocate for a complete prohibition, others contend that personal freedoms should be respected. I firmly believe that smoking should be banned in public areas to safeguard public health and environmental well-being.
Proponents of a smoking ban argue that second-hand smoke poses severe health risks, particularly to vulnerable populations such as children and the elderly. Furthermore, cigarette litter is a significant environmental hazard, contributing to pollution and harming wildlife. By implementing a ban, we can mitigate these health and environmental concerns, fostering a safer and cleaner public environment.
Conversely, opponents of the ban assert that smoking is a personal choice and that individuals should have the autonomy to smoke wherever they desire. They argue that prohibiting smoking infringes upon personal liberties. However, I maintain that the collective well-being of society should take precedence over individual freedoms in this context. Designated smoking areas can be established to accommodate smokers without compromising the health of non-smokers.
In conclusion, the benefits of banning smoking in public places are manifold, encompassing improved public health and environmental protection. Therefore, I strongly advocate for the enforcement of stricter regulations on smoking in public areas.
Scoring Breakdown
- Task Response (TR): 7.0 - Presents a clear position with developed arguments.
- Coherence and Cohesion (CC): 7.0 - Ideas are logically organized with effective use of cohesive devices.
- Lexical Resource (LR): 7.0 - Uses a range of vocabulary with some sophistication.
- Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): 7.0 - Mostly accurate sentences with some complex structures.
Band 8.0 Answer
The debate surrounding the prohibition of smoking in public places has garnered significant attention. While some individuals advocate for a complete ban, others argue for the preservation of personal freedoms. I strongly believe that smoking should be banned in public areas to ensure the well-being of all citizens.
Advocates for a smoking ban posit that second-hand smoke poses severe health risks, particularly to vulnerable populations. Additionally, cigarette litter is a significant environmental concern, contributing to pollution and ecological damage. By implementing a ban, we can mitigate these health and environmental issues, fostering a safer and cleaner public environment. Furthermore, the economic burden of smoking-related healthcare costs can be reduced, benefiting society as a whole.
Opponents of the ban contend that smoking is a personal choice and that individuals should have the autonomy to smoke wherever they desire. They argue that prohibiting smoking infringes upon personal liberties. However, I contend that the collective well-being of society should take precedence over individual freedoms in this context. Designated smoking areas can be established to accommodate smokers without compromising the health of non-smokers. Moreover, the psychological and social benefits of a smoke-free environment should not be underestimated.
In conclusion, the multifaceted benefits of banning smoking in public places are undeniable. Therefore, I strongly advocate for the enforcement of stricter regulations on smoking in public areas to safeguard public health, environmental well-being, and societal harmony.
Scoring Breakdown
- Task Response (TR): 8.0 - Presents a clear position with well-developed arguments and examples.
- Coherence and Cohesion (CC): 8.0 - Ideas are logically organized with effective use of cohesive devices and paragraphing.
- Lexical Resource (LR): 8.0 - Uses a wide range of vocabulary with sophistication and precision.
- Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): 8.0 - Uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures with minimal errors.
Vocabulary Highlights
- Contentious (adj.): Causing or likely to cause disagreement or conflict.
- Example: The contentious issue of smoking in public places has sparked considerable debate.
- Prohibition (n.): The act of forbidding something, especially by law.
- Example: The prohibition of smoking in public places has been widely debated.
- Mitigate (v.): Make less severe, serious, or painful.
- Example: By implementing a ban, we can mitigate these health and environmental concerns.
- Autonomy (n.): The right or condition of self-government.
- Example: They argue that prohibiting smoking infringes upon personal autonomy.
- Ecological (adj.): Relating to the environment and the relationship of living things to their environment.
- Example: Cigarette litter is a significant ecological concern.
- Infringe (v.): Act in a way that deliberately breaks the terms of a law, agreement, etc.
- Example: They argue that prohibiting smoking infringes upon personal liberties.
- Designated (adj.): Appointed, assigned, or set apart for a specific purpose.
- Example: Designated smoking areas can be established to accommodate smokers.
- Collective (adj.): Done by people acting as a group.
- Example: The collective well-being of society should take precedence over individual freedoms.
- Multifaceted (adj.): Having many different aspects or features.
- Example: The multifaceted benefits of banning smoking in public places are undeniable.
- Undeniable (adj.): Impossible to deny or dispute.
- Example: The undeniable benefits of banning smoking in public places.
- Enforcement (n.): The act of compelling observance of or compliance with a law, rule, or obligation.
- Example: The enforcement of stricter regulations on smoking in public areas.
- Safeguard (v.): Protect from harm or damage with defensive measures.
- Example: To safeguard public health and environmental well-being.
- Harmony (n.): The quality of forming a pleasing and consistent whole.
- Example: To safeguard public health, environmental well-being, and societal harmony.
- Vulnerable (adj.): Susceptible to physical or emotional injury or attack.
- Example: Second-hand smoke poses severe health risks, particularly to vulnerable populations.
- Ecological (adj.): Relating to the environment and the relationship of living things to their environment.
- Example: Cigarette litter is a significant ecological concern.
- Psychological (adj.): Relating to the mental and emotional state of a person.
- Example: The psychological and social benefits of a smoke-free environment should not be underestimated.
- Societal (adj.): Relating to society or its organization.
- Example: The societal harmony should not be underestimated.
- Precedence (n.): The condition of being considered more important than someone or something else; priority in importance, order, or rank.
- Example: The collective well-being of society should take precedence over individual freedoms.
- Benefit (n.): An advantage or profit gained from something.
- Example: The benefits of banning smoking in public places are manifold.
- Implementation (n.): The process of putting a decision or plan into effect; execution.
- Example: By implementing a ban, we can mitigate these health and environmental concerns.
Common Mistakes
- Lack of Clear Position: Some students fail to present a clear position on the issue, making their argument weak and unclear.
- Insufficient Development: Students often provide ideas without developing them adequately, leading to shallow arguments.
- Repetition: Repeating the same points or vocabulary can make the essay seem less sophisticated.
- Grammatical Errors: Common grammatical mistakes, such as subject-verb agreement errors, can detract from the overall quality of the essay.
- Poor Vocabulary Choices: Using overly simple or repetitive vocabulary can limit the range and sophistication of the essay.
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