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See exactly what separates a Band 6 from a Band 9 answer for an IELTS Writing Task 2 question on smartphones. This page includes four full model essays with detailed examiner breakdowns, key vocabulary, and common mistakes.
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See exactly what separates a Band 6 from a Band 9 answer for an IELTS Writing Task 2 question on smartphones. This page includes four full model essays with detailed examiner breakdowns, key vocabulary, and common mistakes.
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Prompt: Many people believe that smartphones have improved modern society. Others think they have caused significant problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion about their impact on personal life.
Note: This is a paraphrased example of a common IELTS two-part question format. The original prompt would instruct candidates to 'Discuss both views and give your own opinion.'
Here are four model responses to the same prompt, showing the progression in skill from a Band 6 to a Band 9.
Smartphones are very common now. Many people think they make society better, but others say they make problems. I will discuss both sides.
First, smartphones improve society because they help communication. People can call and message anyone easily. They also give us information from the internet very fast. For example, we can find news or check maps. This is good for society.
However, smartphones also cause problems. One big problem is that people use them too much. They look at their phones all the time and do not talk to friends in real life. This is bad for personal life. Another problem is that phones can be distracting when people are working or studying.
In my opinion, smartphones are good for society but bad for personal life. They help us connect and find information, but they make us less social in person. People should use them less.
(Word count: 150)
Scoring Breakdown (IELTS Task 2):
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It is argued by some that smartphones have been largely beneficial for society, while others contend that they have introduced serious issues. This essay will examine both perspectives before concluding that their impact on personal life is predominantly negative.
Proponents of smartphones highlight their role in enhancing global connectivity and access to information. These devices allow for instant communication across continents, fostering social and business relationships. Moreover, they function as portable libraries, providing educational resources, news, and practical tools like navigation apps, which undoubtedly contribute to societal efficiency and knowledge dissemination.
Conversely, critics point to the detrimental effects on interpersonal skills and mental well-being. Excessive smartphone use, particularly on social media, is linked to increased anxiety and reduced attention spans. In terms of personal life, the constant presence of phones can erode the quality of face-to-face interactions, as individuals may prioritize virtual engagement over real-world conversations with family and friends.
In my view, while smartphones offer clear societal advantages, their influence on personal life is concerning. The erosion of deep, focused relationships and the potential for addiction present significant drawbacks that outweigh the convenience they provide in a personal context.
(Word count: 200)
Scoring Breakdown (IELTS Task 2):
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The proliferation of smartphones has sparked debate regarding their overall societal impact. While some laud them as transformative tools for progress, others decry them as sources of contemporary social ills. This essay will argue that despite their undeniable utility, smartphones have a profoundly negative impact on the fabric of personal life.
Advocates rightly point to the unprecedented access to information and streamlined communication that smartphones facilitate. They have democratized knowledge, empowered remote work and education, and created efficient platforms for civic engagement and commerce. From a macro-societal perspective, these devices are engines of connectivity and productivity.
However, at a micro, personal level, the consequences are more troubling. The very connectivity they provide often leads to superficial relationships, as constant notifications fracture attention and diminish the capacity for sustained, empathetic conversation. Furthermore, the culture of comparison cultivated by social media apps can exacerbate feelings of inadequacy and loneliness. Personal life is not just about connection, but the quality of that connection, which smartphones often degrade through perpetual distraction.
In conclusion, although smartphones are powerful societal tools, their intrusion into personal spheres is largely deleterious. They prioritize breadth of connection over depth, and convenience over genuine engagement, ultimately impoverishing the interpersonal experiences that define a meaningful personal life.
(Word count: 220)
Scoring Breakdown (IELTS Task 2):
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The ubiquitous presence of smartphones has rendered them a defining technology of the 21st century, yet their net impact remains fiercely contested. While they undeniably function as catalysts for societal advancement in communication and information access, I concur with the perspective that they have precipitated significant problems, particularly the erosion of authentic personal interaction and mental well-being.
From a societal standpoint, smartphones are unparalleled conduits for global connectivity and knowledge democratization. They have dismantled geographical barriers, enabling real-time collaboration and fostering a more informed citizenry through immediate access to global events and academic resources. This has unequivocally accelerated economic and educational paradigms.
Nevertheless, these macro-level benefits obscure profound personal costs. The architecture of smartphone applications is designed to captivate attention, often fostering a state of continuous partial attention that undermines the depth of personal relationships. The phenomenon of 'phubbing'—snubbing others in favour of one's phone—exemplifies how these devices can impoverish face-to-face communication. Moreover, the curated realities presented on social media platforms can instigate a pervasive sense of social comparison and anxiety, directly corroding individual contentment and self-esteem.
Therefore, although smartphones are instrumental for societal efficiency, their intrusion into the personal realm is largely pernicious. They risk replacing the nuanced tapestry of human interaction with a streamlined, yet superficial, digital alternative, ultimately compromising the very qualities that constitute a rich personal life.
(Word count: 230)
Scoring Breakdown (IELTS Task 2):
| Word/Phrase | Definition | Example Collocation | | :--- | :--- | :--- | | Ubiquitous | Being or seeming to be everywhere at the same time. | The ubiquitous presence of smartphones. | Proliferation | Rapid increase in the number or amount of something. | The proliferation of digital devices. | Catalyst | A person or thing that causes a change. | A catalyst for social change. | Precipitate (v.) | To cause something to happen suddenly or unexpectedly. | Precipitate a crisis. | Conduit | A channel for conveying something. | A conduit for information. | Democratization | The process of making something accessible to everyone. | The democratization of knowledge. | Deleterious | Causing harm or damage. | A deleterious effect on health. | Pernicious | Having a harmful effect, especially in a gradual or subtle way. | A pernicious influence. | Erode | To gradually destroy or be gradually destroyed. | Erode trust / Erode social skills. | Impoverish | To make poor in quality; to exhaust the strength or vitality of. | Impoverish the experience. | Fabric of life | The underlying structure of everyday experience. | Damaging the social fabric / fabric of community. | Curated reality | A carefully selected and edited version of events or life. | The curated reality of social media. | Cognitive offloading | Using external tools to reduce mental effort. | Smartphones encourage cognitive offloading. | Continuous partial attention | Paying superficial attention to multiple things simultaneously. | A state of continuous partial attention. | Phubbing | The act of ignoring someone in favour of a mobile phone. | Phubbing is a modern social problem.
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