IELTS Writing Task 2: Parenting Styles – Band 8.0 Sample with Full Breakdown
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Prompt
Some people believe that parents should encourage their children to be independent, while others think parents should protect their children from making mistakes. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Model Answers
Band 6.0 Answer
Sample Answer
In my opinion, parents should let their children make their own decisions. This is because children need to learn how to solve problems on their own. For example, if a child wants to play outside, parents should let them go even if they might fall and get hurt. Additionally, children who are independent will be more successful in the future. For instance, they will be better at their jobs because they can make decisions without asking for help all the time.
However, some people think parents should protect their children. They believe that children are too young to make good decisions. For example, if a child wants to eat a lot of candy, parents should say no because it is not healthy. Also, parents can teach their children right from wrong. For instance, if a child lies, parents should punish them so they learn not to do it again.
In conclusion, I think parents should let their children be independent. This will help them become better adults.
Scoring Breakdown
- Task Response (TR): Addresses the task but presents a position in a limited way. The argument is not fully extended and supported.
- Coherence and Cohesion (CC): Ideas are organized but there is some repetition and lack of clear progression.
- Lexical Resource (LR): Uses some less common vocabulary but with some errors in word choice and collocation.
- Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): Uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms but with frequent errors.
Band 7.0 Answer
Sample Answer
The debate over whether parents should encourage independence or protect their children from mistakes is a contentious one. On one hand, fostering independence in children is crucial for their development. When children are allowed to make their own decisions, they learn valuable problem-solving skills. For example, a child who is encouraged to choose their own clothes learns to make decisions and take responsibility for their choices. Moreover, independent children are often more confident and resilient, qualities that are essential in adulthood. For instance, a study by Cambridge Assessment English found that children who were given more freedom to make decisions were better equipped to handle challenges in their future careers.
On the other hand, there are valid reasons why some parents prefer to protect their children. Young children often lack the experience and judgment to make sound decisions. For example, a child might not understand the consequences of eating too much junk food, leading to health issues. Additionally, parents play a crucial role in teaching their children right from wrong. For instance, if a child lies, parents can use this as a teaching moment to explain the importance of honesty.
In my opinion, a balanced approach is best. Parents should encourage independence but also provide guidance and protection when necessary. This way, children can learn to make good decisions while still having the support they need.
Scoring Breakdown
- Task Response (TR): Addresses the task and presents a clear position with some extension and support.
- Coherence and Cohesion (CC): Ideas are logically organized with clear progression and some use of cohesive devices.
- Lexical Resource (LR): Uses a mix of common and less common vocabulary with some errors in word choice and collocation.
- Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): Uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms with some errors but generally good control.
Band 8.0 Answer
Sample Answer
The role of parents in shaping their children's independence is a topic of much debate. Proponents of encouraging independence argue that it is essential for a child's development. Allowing children to make their own decisions fosters critical thinking and problem-solving skills. For example, a child who is encouraged to plan their own schedule learns to manage their time effectively. Furthermore, independent children often exhibit greater confidence and resilience, which are invaluable traits in adulthood. According to a study by ETS, children who are given the freedom to make decisions are more likely to succeed in their academic and professional lives.
Conversely, there are compelling reasons why some parents prefer to protect their children. Young children often lack the experience and judgment to make sound decisions. For instance, a child might not fully comprehend the consequences of spending too much time on electronic devices, leading to potential health issues. Additionally, parents play a pivotal role in teaching their children moral values. For example, if a child exhibits aggressive behavior, parents can intervene and teach them the importance of empathy and respect.
In my view, a balanced approach is the most effective. Parents should encourage independence but also provide guidance and protection when necessary. This way, children can learn to make informed decisions while still having the support they need. Ultimately, the goal should be to raise well-rounded individuals who are capable of navigating the complexities of the modern world.
Scoring Breakdown
- Task Response (TR): Addresses the task and presents a clear position with well-extended and supported ideas.
- Coherence and Cohesion (CC): Ideas are logically organized with clear progression and effective use of cohesive devices.
- Lexical Resource (LR): Uses a mix of common and less common vocabulary with some sophisticated vocabulary and generally appropriate word choice and collocation.
- Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): Uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms with rare errors and generally good control.
Vocabulary Highlights
- Contentious (adj.): Causing or likely to cause disagreement or conflict.
- Example: The debate over parenting styles is highly contentious.
- Foster (verb): To encourage or promote the development of something.
- Example: Parents should foster independence in their children.
- Resilient (adj.): Able to withstand or recover quickly from difficult conditions.
- Example: Independent children are often more resilient.
- Judgment (noun): The ability to make considered decisions or come to sensible conclusions.
- Example: Young children often lack the judgment to make sound decisions.
- Pivotal (adj.): Of crucial importance in relation to the development or success of something else.
- Example: Parents play a pivotal role in teaching their children moral values.
- Empathy (noun): The ability to understand and share the feelings of another.
- Example: Parents can teach their children the importance of empathy.
- Navigating (verb): To plan and direct the course of a ship, aircraft, or other form of transport, especially by using instruments or maps.
- Example: Children need to learn how to navigate the complexities of the modern world.
- Invaluable (adj.): Extremely useful; indispensable.
- Example: Independence is an invaluable trait in adulthood.
- Intervene (verb): Take action in order to improve a situation or prevent it from worsening.
- Example: Parents can intervene and teach their children the importance of empathy.
- Comprehend (verb): To grasp the meaning of something.
- Example: A child might not fully comprehend the consequences of their actions.
- Balanced (adj.): Having a balanced approach or viewpoint.
- Example: A balanced approach to parenting is the most effective.
- Guidance (noun): Advice or information aimed at resolving a problem or difficulty.
- Example: Parents should provide guidance to their children.
- Moral (adj.): Relating to principles of right and wrong behavior.
- Example: Parents play a crucial role in teaching their children moral values.
- Complexities (noun): A situation, problem, or explanation that is difficult to understand or explain.
- Example: Children need to learn how to navigate the complexities of the modern world.
- Informed (adj.): Having or showing knowledge of a subject or situation.
- Example: Children should learn to make informed decisions.
Common Mistakes
- Overgeneralization: Making broad statements without sufficient evidence or examples.
- Lack of Clarity: Failing to clearly express ideas, leading to confusion.
- Repetition: Repeating the same ideas or phrases without adding new information.
- Poor Organization: Presenting ideas in a disorganized manner, making it difficult to follow the argument.
- Inadequate Vocabulary: Using simple or repetitive vocabulary instead of a mix of common and less common words.
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