IELTS Writing Task 2: Money And Happiness (Two Part Question) — Band 6/7/8/9 Model Answers

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The Prompt

Paraphrased Prompt: Some people believe that money is the key to happiness, while others argue that happiness comes from non-materialistic sources. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Model Answers

Band 6.0 Answer

Sample Answer:

Money is often seen as the most important factor for happiness, but others think happiness comes from different sources. I agree with the second view.

Firstly, money can bring happiness because it allows people to buy things they want. For example, a person with more money can afford a bigger house or nicer clothes. This can make them feel happier. However, money cannot buy everything that makes people happy. For instance, having a lot of money does not guarantee good health or strong relationships.

Secondly, happiness can come from non-materialistic sources. Spending time with family and friends is one example. Another example is pursuing hobbies or interests that bring joy. These things do not cost money but can bring a lot of happiness.

In conclusion, while money can bring some happiness, it is not the only source. Other factors like relationships and hobbies are also important for a happy life.

Scoring Breakdown:

• Task Response (TR): Presents a position but development is limited. Some ideas are relevant but not fully extended.
• Coherence and Cohesion (CC): Ideas are logically ordered but there is some repetition and lack of clear progression.
• Lexical Resource (LR): Uses some appropriate vocabulary but with some errors and limited range.
• Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): Uses simple sentence structures with some errors.

Band 7.0 Answer

Sample Answer:

The relationship between money and happiness is a complex issue. While some people believe that financial wealth is essential for a fulfilling life, others argue that true happiness stems from non-materialistic sources. I tend to agree with the latter view.

On one hand, money can indeed contribute to happiness by providing comfort and security. For example, financial stability can reduce stress and anxiety, allowing individuals to focus on other aspects of their lives. Additionally, money can facilitate experiences such as travel or education, which can enrich one's life. However, the pursuit of wealth can also lead to stress and dissatisfaction, as people may constantly feel the need to accumulate more.

On the other hand, happiness can be derived from non-materialistic sources. Strong social connections, for instance, have been shown to significantly impact overall well-being. Engaging in hobbies or activities that bring joy, regardless of cost, can also contribute to a sense of fulfillment. Moreover, personal growth and self-actualization, which are not dependent on financial status, play a crucial role in achieving happiness.

In conclusion, while money can contribute to happiness, it is not the sole determinant. A balanced approach that values both material and non-material aspects of life is likely to lead to greater overall happiness.

Scoring Breakdown:

• Task Response (TR): Presents a clear position with relevant, extended ideas. Supports points with some examples.
• Coherence and Cohesion (CC): Ideas are logically organized with clear progression. Uses cohesive devices effectively.
• Lexical Resource (LR): Uses a mix of appropriate vocabulary with some less common lexical items.
• Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): Uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures with some errors.

Band 8.0 Answer

Sample Answer:

The notion that money is synonymous with happiness has been a subject of debate for decades. While some individuals posit that financial prosperity is the cornerstone of a happy life, others contend that true contentment is derived from non-materialistic pursuits. I am inclined to support the latter perspective.

Proponents of the view that money brings happiness argue that financial resources provide the means to acquire material possessions and experiences that enhance one's quality of life. For instance, a person with substantial financial resources can afford to travel to exotic locations, enjoy gourmet dining, and purchase luxury items, all of which can contribute to a sense of fulfillment. Furthermore, financial stability can alleviate stress and anxiety, allowing individuals to focus on other aspects of their lives. However, it is essential to note that the pursuit of wealth can also lead to a phenomenon known as hedonic adaptation, where individuals quickly become accustomed to their newfound luxuries and require even more to achieve the same level of satisfaction.

Conversely, happiness can be derived from non-materialistic sources. Strong interpersonal relationships, for example, have been shown to be a significant predictor of overall well-being. Engaging in activities that align with one's passions and interests, regardless of their monetary value, can also contribute to a sense of purpose and fulfillment. Moreover, personal growth and self-actualization, which are not contingent on financial status, play a pivotal role in achieving lasting happiness.

In conclusion, while money can contribute to happiness, it is not the sole determinant. A holistic approach that values both material and non-material aspects of life is likely to lead to greater overall happiness.

Scoring Breakdown:

• Task Response (TR): Presents a clear, supported position with relevant, extended, and supported ideas. Uses examples and clear progression.
• Coherence and Cohesion (CC): Ideas are logically organized with clear progression. Uses cohesive devices effectively and flexibly.
• Lexical Resource (LR): Uses a wide range of vocabulary with some less common lexical items used appropriately.
• Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): Uses a wide range of complex sentence structures with some errors.

Band 9.0 Answer

Sample Answer:

The interplay between financial prosperity and personal contentment is a multifaceted issue that has garnered significant attention in contemporary discourse. While some individuals advocate for the primacy of economic affluence in achieving happiness, others espouse the view that true fulfillment is derived from non-materialistic pursuits. I am firmly of the opinion that the latter perspective is more tenable.

Advocates of the notion that money brings happiness posit that financial resources provide the means to acquire material possessions and experiences that enhance one's quality of life. For instance, a person with substantial financial resources can afford to travel to exotic locations, enjoy gourmet dining, and purchase luxury items, all of which can contribute to a sense of fulfillment. Furthermore, financial stability can alleviate stress and anxiety, allowing individuals to focus on other aspects of their lives. However, it is crucial to acknowledge that the pursuit of wealth can also lead to a phenomenon known as hedonic adaptation, where individuals quickly become accustomed to their newfound luxuries and require even more to achieve the same level of satisfaction. Moreover, the relentless pursuit of financial gain can engender a sense of alienation and disconnection from one's community and loved ones, thereby undermining the very happiness it seeks to attain.

Conversely, happiness can be derived from non-materialistic sources. Strong interpersonal relationships, for example, have been shown to be a significant predictor of overall well-being. Engaging in activities that align with one's passions and interests, regardless of their monetary value, can also contribute to a sense of purpose and fulfillment. Moreover, personal growth and self-actualization, which are not contingent on financial status, play a pivotal role in achieving lasting happiness. Research has consistently demonstrated that individuals who prioritize personal growth and meaningful relationships tend to report higher levels of life satisfaction than those who focus solely on material wealth.

In conclusion, while money can contribute to happiness, it is not the sole determinant. A holistic approach that values both material and non-material aspects of life is likely to lead to greater overall happiness. It is imperative that individuals strive for a balanced life that encompasses both financial stability and meaningful, non-materialistic pursuits.

Scoring Breakdown:

• Task Response (TR): Presents a clear, fully supported position with relevant, extended, and supported ideas. Uses examples and clear progression.
• Coherence and Cohesion (CC): Ideas are logically organized with clear progression. Uses cohesive devices effectively and flexibly.
• Lexical Resource (LR): Uses a wide range of vocabulary with less common lexical items used appropriately and naturally.
• Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): Uses a wide range of complex sentence structures with minimal errors.

Vocabulary Highlights

1. Prosperity (noun): Wealth and success. Example: Financial prosperity can lead to a better quality of life.
2. Contentment (noun): A state of happiness and satisfaction. Example: True contentment comes from within.
3. Affluence (noun): Wealth or abundance. Example: Economic affluence does not guarantee happiness.
4. Fulfillment (noun): A sense of satisfaction or achievement. Example: Engaging in hobbies can bring a sense of fulfillment.
5. Hedonic adaptation (noun): The tendency to quickly return to a baseline level of happiness despite major positive or negative events. Example: Hedonic adaptation can diminish the joy of new possessions.
6. Alienation (noun): The state of being isolated or estranged. Example: The pursuit of wealth can lead to alienation from loved ones.
7. Non-materialistic (adjective): Not concerned with material possessions. Example: Non-materialistic pursuits can bring lasting happiness.
8. Self-actualization (noun): The realization or fulfillment of one's talents and potentialities. Example: Personal growth and self-actualization are crucial for happiness.
9. Holistic (adjective): Characterized by the belief that the parts of something are interconnected and can only be understood in relation to the whole. Example: A holistic approach to life can lead to greater happiness.
10. Imperative (adjective): Of vital importance. Example: It is imperative to strive for a balanced life.

Common Mistakes Students Make

1. Lack of Clear Position: Failing to present a clear stance on the issue, leading to a vague and unfocused response.
2. Inadequate Development: Not fully developing ideas with relevant examples and explanations.
3. Poor Organization: Presenting ideas in a disjointed manner, making the response difficult to follow.
4. Limited Vocabulary: Using a narrow range of vocabulary, which can make the response seem repetitive and less engaging.
5. Grammatical Errors: Making frequent grammatical mistakes that detract from the overall quality of the response.

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