IELTS Writing Task 2: Junk Food Tax - Band 7.5 Sample with Full Breakdown

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The Prompt

Some governments have introduced the idea of taxing junk food to encourage healthier eating habits. Do you think this is a good idea?

Model Answers

Band 6.0 Answer

The government should tax junk food to make people eat healthier. I agree with this idea because junk food is bad for health and people eat too much of it.

Junk food is very unhealthy. It has a lot of fat and sugar, which can cause diseases like diabetes and heart problems. Many people eat junk food every day, especially children. This is bad because it can make them sick when they grow up.

Taxing junk food is a good way to solve this problem. If junk food is more expensive, people will buy less of it. They will eat more fruits and vegetables instead. This will make everyone healthier.

Some people say that taxing junk food is not fair. They say that people should have the right to choose what they eat. However, the government should protect people's health. If people eat too much junk food, they will get sick and this will cost the government more money.

In conclusion, taxing junk food is a good idea. It will make people eat healthier and save money for the government.

Scoring Breakdown

• Task Response (TR): 5.0 - Presents a clear position but lacks development and supporting ideas.
• Coherence and Cohesion (CC): 5.5 - Ideas are logically organized but lack clear progression and cohesive devices.
• Lexical Resource (LR): 5.5 - Uses a mix of appropriate and limited vocabulary with some errors.
• Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): 5.5 - Uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms with frequent errors.

Band 7.5 Answer

The implementation of a tax on junk food as a means to promote healthier eating habits is a contentious issue with valid arguments on both sides.

On one hand, proponents argue that such a tax is a necessary measure to combat the rising obesity epidemic. Junk food, often high in calories, sugar, and unhealthy fats, contributes significantly to various health problems. By imposing a tax, governments can discourage consumption and fund public health initiatives. For instance, countries like Mexico have seen a reduction in junk food purchases following the implementation of similar taxes. Moreover, the revenue generated can be allocated to subsidize healthier food options, making them more accessible to all socioeconomic groups.

However, opponents contend that taxing junk food infringes on personal liberties and may not be effective. They argue that individuals should have the freedom to choose their diet without government intervention. Additionally, low-income families may be disproportionately affected, as they often rely on cheaper, less nutritious food options. Furthermore, some studies suggest that such taxes do not significantly alter consumption patterns, as people may continue to purchase junk food despite the increased cost.

In conclusion, while the intention behind taxing junk food is commendable, its effectiveness and fairness are debatable. Governments should consider a balanced approach, combining education, regulation, and incentives to promote healthier eating habits without unduly burdening consumers.

Scoring Breakdown

• Task Response (TR): 7.0 - Presents a clear position with relevant, extended, and supported ideas.
• Coherence and Cohesion (CC): 7.5 - Uses cohesive devices effectively and organizes information logically.
• Lexical Resource (LR): 7.5 - Uses a range of vocabulary with some less common lexical items and few errors.
• Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): 7.5 - Uses a mix of complex and simple sentence forms with frequent errors but maintains overall clarity.

Band 8.0 Answer

The debate surrounding the taxation of junk food to encourage healthier eating habits is multifaceted, with compelling arguments on both sides.

Advocates for the tax assert that it is a crucial step in addressing the global health crisis. The consumption of junk food has been linked to a myriad of health issues, including obesity, diabetes, and cardiovascular diseases. By imposing a tax, governments can deter consumption and allocate funds to public health campaigns. For example, Hungary's implementation of a junk food tax led to a notable decrease in the purchase of unhealthy products. Additionally, the revenue generated can be used to subsidize fruits and vegetables, making them more affordable and accessible.

Conversely, critics argue that such a tax is an infringement on personal freedoms and may have unintended consequences. They posit that individuals should have the autonomy to make their own dietary choices. Furthermore, low-income families may bear the brunt of the tax, as they often rely on cheaper, less nutritious food options. Some studies suggest that the tax may not significantly alter consumption patterns, as people may continue to purchase junk food despite the increased cost.

In conclusion, while the taxation of junk food is a well-intentioned policy, its effectiveness and fairness are subject to debate. Governments should adopt a holistic approach, combining education, regulation, and incentives to promote healthier eating habits without disproportionately affecting vulnerable populations.

Scoring Breakdown

• Task Response (TR): 8.0 - Presents a clear position with relevant, extended, and supported ideas, demonstrating a clear progression.
• Coherence and Cohesion (CC): 8.0 - Uses cohesive devices effectively and organizes information logically with clear progression.
• Lexical Resource (LR): 8.0 - Uses a range of vocabulary with less common lexical items and few errors.
• Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): 8.0 - Uses a mix of complex and simple sentence forms with frequent errors but maintains overall clarity and precision.

Vocabulary Highlights

1. Contentious (adjective): causing or likely to cause disagreement or argument.

• Example: The issue of junk food taxation is highly contentious.

1. Combat (verb): take action to reduce or prevent (something bad or undesirable).

• Example: Governments need to combat the rising obesity epidemic.

1. Subsidize (verb): support (an organization or activity) financially.

• Example: The revenue can be used to subsidize healthier food options.

1. Infringe (verb): actively break the terms of (a law, agreement, etc.).

• Example: Taxing junk food may infringe on personal liberties.

1. Autonomy (noun): the right or condition of self-government.

• Example: Individuals should have the autonomy to make their own dietary choices.

1. Holistic (adjective): characterized by the belief that the parts of something are intimately interconnected and explicable only by reference to the whole.

• Example: A holistic approach is needed to address the issue of unhealthy eating.

1. Myriad (adjective): countless or extremely numerous.

• Example: Junk food consumption has been linked to a myriad of health issues.

1. Deter (verb): discourage (someone) from doing something by instilling doubt or fear of the consequences.

• Example: The tax aims to deter consumption of junk food.

1. Allocate (verb): distribute (resources or duties) for a particular purpose.

• Example: Funds can be allocated to public health campaigns.

1. Accessible (adjective): (of a place) able to be reached or entered.

• Example: Healthier food options should be made more accessible.

1. Proportionately (adverb): in proportion; correspondingly.

• Example: The tax should not disproportionately affect vulnerable populations.

1. Revenue (noun): income, especially when of a company or organization, from business activities.

• Example: The revenue generated can be used for public health initiatives.

1. Epidemic (noun): a widespread occurrence of an infectious disease in a community at a particular time.

• Example: The rising obesity epidemic is a global health crisis.

1. Campaign (noun): an organized course of action to achieve a particular goal.

• Example: Public health campaigns can educate people about healthy eating.

1. Autonomy (noun): the right or condition of self-government.

• Example: Individuals should have the autonomy to make their own dietary choices.

Common Mistakes

1. Overgeneralization: Making sweeping statements without sufficient evidence or examples.
2. Lack of Balance: Failing to address both sides of the argument equally.
3. Vague Language: Using imprecise or unclear language that weakens the argument.
4. Poor Organization: Presenting ideas in a disjointed or illogical manner.
5. Grammatical Errors: Making frequent grammatical mistakes that hinder comprehension.

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