IELTS Writing Task 2: Individual Vs Society — Band 6.5 Sample with Full Breakdown
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Prompt
Some people believe that individuals should be responsible for their own lives, while others argue that society should take care of its members. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Band 6.5 Sample Answer
Individuals should be responsible for their own lives, but society should also support its members. There are arguments for both views.
On one hand, people should take care of themselves. This is because everyone has different needs and desires. For example, some people want to travel and see the world, while others prefer to stay at home and enjoy quiet activities. If society takes care of everyone, it may not be able to meet the individual needs of its members. Additionally, people who rely on society may become lazy and not try to improve their lives. For instance, some people may choose to live on welfare instead of finding a job and supporting themselves.
On the other hand, society should also take care of its members. This is because everyone deserves a basic standard of living. For example, everyone needs food, shelter, and healthcare. If people are not provided with these basic needs, they may not be able to live happy and productive lives. Additionally, society benefits when its members are healthy and productive. For instance, people who are healthy and productive can contribute to the economy and make society a better place.
In conclusion, individuals should be responsible for their own lives, but society should also support its members. This is because everyone has different needs and deserves a basic standard of living. Society benefits when its members are healthy and productive, and individuals benefit when they are able to meet their own needs and desires.
Scoring Breakdown
Task Response (6.0)
- Presents a clear position throughout the response.
- Presents, extends, and supports main trends, ideas, or arguments.
- Provides some development of arguments and supports them with reasons and examples.
- Presents a conclusion that follows from the argument presented.
Coherence and Cohesion (6.0)
- Uses cohesive devices effectively, but there may be some under- or over-use.
- Arranges information and ideas coherently, but there may be some unclear relationships between ideas.
- Uses paragraphs effectively, but there may be some unclear paragraphing.
Lexical Resource (6.0)
- Uses a sufficient range of vocabulary to allow some flexibility and precision.
- Uses some less common vocabulary, but there may be some errors in word choice and collocation.
- Uses some idiomatic vocabulary, but there may be some errors in usage.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy (6.5)
- Uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms.
- Makes some errors in grammar and punctuation, but these errors do not impede communication.
- Uses a mix of tenses and sentence structures, but there may be some errors in usage.
Vocabulary Highlights
- Responsible: (adjective) having an obligation to do something, or having control over or care for someone, as part of one's job or role.
- Example: Individuals should be responsible for their own lives.
- Support: (verb) to give assistance or approval to someone or something.
- Example: Society should support its members.
- Desire: (noun) a strong feeling of wanting to have something or wishing for something to happen.
- Example: Everyone has different needs and desires.
- Welfare: (noun) the health, happiness, and prosperity of a person, group, or organization.
- Example: Some people may choose to live on welfare instead of finding a job.
- Productive: (adjective) achieving or producing a significant amount or result.
- Example: Society benefits when its members are healthy and productive.
- Contribute: (verb) to give something, especially money, in order to help achieve or provide something.
- Example: People who are healthy and productive can contribute to the economy.
- Basic: (adjective) forming an essential foundation; fundamental.
- Example: Everyone deserves a basic standard of living.
- Standard: (noun) a level of quality or attainment.
- Example: Everyone deserves a basic standard of living.
- Meet: (verb) to come together or come into the presence of by chance; to encounter.
- Example: Individuals benefit when they are able to meet their own needs and desires.
- Lazy: (adjective) unwilling to work or use energy; indolent.
- Example: People who rely on society may become lazy and not try to improve their lives.
- Improve: (verb) to make or become better.
- Example: People who rely on society may become lazy and not try to improve their lives.
- Happiness: (noun) the state of being happy.
- Example: Everyone needs food, shelter, and healthcare to live happy and productive lives.
- Healthcare: (noun) the prevention, treatment, and management of illness and the preservation of mental and physical well-being through the services offered by the medical and allied health professions.
- Example: Everyone needs food, shelter, and healthcare to live happy and productive lives.
- Economy: (noun) the state of a country or region in terms of the production and consumption of goods and services and the supply of money.
- Example: People who are healthy and productive can contribute to the economy.
- Place: (noun) a particular position, point, or area in space; a location.
- Example: Society benefits when its members are healthy and productive and make society a better place.
Common Mistakes
- Lack of Clear Position: Some students may present both views equally without showing a clear preference or opinion.
- Insufficient Development: Some students may present their arguments but not develop them with reasons and examples.
- Poor Coherence and Cohesion: Some students may have unclear relationships between ideas or unclear paragraphing.
- Limited Vocabulary: Some students may use a limited range of vocabulary, which can make their writing sound repetitive and dull.
- Grammatical Errors: Some students may make errors in grammar and punctuation that can impede communication.
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