IELTS Writing Task 2: Happiness - Band 9.0 Sample with Full Breakdown

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Full Prompt

Some people believe that happiness is simply a matter of luck. Others think that happiness can be achieved through careful planning. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Model Answers

Band 6.0

The topic of happiness is very important in today's society. Some people think that happiness is just luck, while others believe that planning can make you happy. I think both views are correct.

People who think happiness is luck say that you are born happy or not. For example, if you have a good family, you are lucky and happy. But if you have problems, like sickness or poverty, you are not happy. This is true because many people cannot control their lives.

On the other hand, some people say that planning can make you happy. They believe that if you set goals and work hard, you can achieve happiness. For example, if you want a good job, you can study hard and get it. This makes you happy because you worked for it.

In my opinion, both views are correct. Sometimes happiness is luck, like having a good family. But sometimes, happiness comes from planning, like getting a good job. So, happiness is a mix of both.

Scoring Breakdown

• Task Response (TR) 5.0: Presents a position but does not fully address the task. The response is relevant but lacks depth.
• Coherence and Cohesion (CC) 6.0: Ideas are organized but with some repetition and lack of clear progression.
• Lexical Resource (LR) 6.0: Uses some appropriate vocabulary but with frequent errors and limited range.
• Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA) 6.0: Uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms but with frequent errors.

Band 7.0

The notion of happiness has been debated for centuries, with some arguing that it is purely a matter of luck, while others contend that it can be attained through deliberate planning. This essay will explore both perspectives before presenting a personal stance.

Proponents of the luck argument posit that happiness is largely determined by external factors beyond one's control. For instance, individuals born into affluent families tend to enjoy greater happiness due to financial security and access to resources. Conversely, those facing adversity, such as illness or poverty, often struggle to find happiness. This perspective is supported by the fact that many people's circumstances are predetermined by factors like genetics and socioeconomic status.

Conversely, advocates of the planning argument assert that happiness can be cultivated through strategic goal-setting and effort. For example, pursuing higher education can lead to better career opportunities, which in turn contribute to overall life satisfaction. This viewpoint is bolstered by numerous success stories of individuals who have overcome challenges through perseverance and planning.

In my view, while luck plays a significant role in happiness, deliberate planning is equally crucial. A balanced approach that acknowledges both external circumstances and personal effort is essential for achieving lasting happiness.

Scoring Breakdown

• Task Response (TR) 7.0: Presents a clear position and addresses the task. The response is relevant and extends the discussion with some development.
• Coherence and Cohesion (CC) 7.0: Ideas are logically organized with clear progression and some use of cohesive devices.
• Lexical Resource (LR) 7.0: Uses a mix of appropriate vocabulary with some less common lexical items but occasional errors.
• Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA) 7.0: Uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms with some errors but generally effective communication.

Band 8.0

The concept of happiness has long been a subject of philosophical inquiry, with divergent views on whether it is a product of fortune or a result of meticulous planning. This essay will critically examine both perspectives before offering a nuanced opinion.

Those who attribute happiness to luck argue that it is largely influenced by external factors such as family background, socioeconomic status, and genetic predispositions. For example, individuals born into prosperous families often enjoy a higher quality of life, which contributes to their overall well-being. Conversely, those facing adversity, such as chronic illness or financial instability, may find it challenging to attain happiness. This perspective is supported by empirical studies indicating that external circumstances significantly impact an individual's happiness levels.

On the other hand, proponents of the planning argument contend that happiness can be actively pursued and achieved through deliberate efforts. For instance, setting and achieving personal and professional goals can lead to a sense of accomplishment and fulfillment. This viewpoint is reinforced by the success stories of individuals who have overcome significant obstacles through determination and strategic planning.

In my opinion, while luck undoubtedly plays a role in happiness, the ability to plan and make conscious choices is equally, if not more, important. A balanced approach that acknowledges both the influence of external circumstances and the power of personal agency is essential for achieving a fulfilling and happy life.

Scoring Breakdown

• Task Response (TR) 8.0: Presents a clear and sustained position with a comprehensive discussion. The response is relevant, extended, and supported by appropriate examples.
• Coherence and Cohesion (CC) 8.0: Ideas are logically organized with clear progression and effective use of cohesive devices.
• Lexical Resource (LR) 8.0: Uses a wide range of vocabulary with flexibility and precision, including some less common lexical items.
• Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA) 8.0: Uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms with generally accurate grammar and punctuation.

Band 9.0

The pursuit of happiness is a universal human aspiration, yet there is considerable debate regarding whether it is a matter of luck or a result of deliberate planning. This essay will explore both viewpoints before presenting a well-considered opinion.

Advocates of the luck perspective argue that happiness is largely determined by external factors such as family background, socioeconomic status, and genetic predispositions. For instance, individuals born into affluent families often enjoy a higher quality of life, which contributes to their overall well-being. Conversely, those facing adversity, such as chronic illness or financial instability, may find it challenging to attain happiness. This perspective is supported by extensive research indicating that external circumstances significantly impact an individual's happiness levels.

Conversely, those who believe in the power of planning contend that happiness can be actively pursued and achieved through strategic goal-setting and consistent effort. For example, pursuing higher education can lead to better career opportunities, which in turn contribute to overall life satisfaction. This viewpoint is bolstered by numerous success stories of individuals who have overcome significant obstacles through perseverance and meticulous planning.

In my view, while luck undoubtedly plays a role in happiness, the ability to plan and make conscious choices is equally, if not more, important. A balanced approach that acknowledges both the influence of external circumstances and the power of personal agency is essential for achieving a fulfilling and happy life. Ultimately, happiness is a multifaceted concept that requires a combination of both luck and deliberate effort.

Scoring Breakdown

• Task Response (TR) 9.0: Presents a clear, sustained, and supported position with a comprehensive discussion. The response is relevant, extended, and supported by appropriate, relevant, and sufficient examples.
• Coherence and Cohesion (CC) 9.0: Ideas are logically organized with clear progression and effective use of cohesive devices. The response is easy to follow and understand.
• Lexical Resource (LR) 9.0: Uses a wide range of vocabulary with flexibility and precision, including sophisticated and less common lexical items. The vocabulary is used appropriately and effectively.
• Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA) 9.0: Uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms with generally accurate grammar and punctuation. The response is free from errors and easy to understand.

Vocabulary Highlights

1. Aspiration (noun) - a strong desire to achieve something: Her aspiration to become a doctor drove her to study hard.
2. Determined (adjective) - having made a firm decision and being resolved not to change it: She was determined to pass the exam despite the challenges.
3. Empirical (adjective) - based on observation or experience rather than theory or pure logic: The study provided empirical evidence supporting the theory.
4. Fulfillment (noun) - the achievement of something desired, promised, or predicted: His promotion brought a sense of fulfillment and satisfaction.
5. Luck (noun) - success or failure apparently brought by chance rather than through one's own actions: She attributed her success to hard work rather than luck.
6. Meticulous (adjective) - very careful and precise: The scientist conducted a meticulous analysis of the data.
7. Nuanced (adjective) - characterized by subtle differences or shades of meaning: The novel offers a nuanced portrayal of the characters.
8. Perseverance (noun) - steadfastness in doing something despite difficulty or delay in achieving success: Her perseverance paid off when she finally passed the exam.
9. Prosperous (adjective) - successful in material terms; flourishing financially: They lived a prosperous life in the countryside.
10. Strategic (adjective) - relating to the identification of long-term or overall aims and interests and the means of achieving them: The company implemented a strategic plan to expand its market share.
11. Sustained (adjective) - continuing for an extended period or maintained at a consistent level: The athlete demonstrated sustained effort throughout the competition.
12. Universal (adjective) - applicable to all cases; of general application: The principles of human rights are universal and inalienable.
13. Well-being (noun) - the state of being comfortable, healthy, or happy: Her well-being improved significantly after she started exercising regularly.
14. Adversity (noun) - a difficult or unpleasant situation: She faced numerous adversities but never gave up on her dreams.
15. Conscious (adjective) - aware of and responding to one's surroundings; awake: She made a conscious decision to change her lifestyle.
16. Deliberate (adjective) - done consciously and intentionally: His deliberate actions were aimed at achieving his goals.
17. Empirical (adjective) - based on observation or experience rather than theory or pure logic: The study provided empirical evidence supporting the theory.
18. Fulfillment (noun) - the achievement of something desired, promised, or predicted: His promotion brought a sense of fulfillment and satisfaction.
19. Luck (noun) - success or failure apparently brought by chance rather than through one's own actions: She attributed her success to hard work rather than luck.
20. Meticulous (adjective) - very careful and precise: The scientist conducted a meticulous analysis of the data.

Common Mistakes Students Make

1. Overgeneralizing: Students often make broad statements without providing specific examples or evidence to support their claims. This weakens their argument and reduces the overall quality of their response.
2. Lack of Clarity: Some students struggle to express their ideas clearly and coherently. This can result in a response that is difficult to follow and understand.
3. Inadequate Vocabulary: Using limited or inappropriate vocabulary can make the response less engaging and less effective. Students should aim to use a wide range of vocabulary, including sophisticated and less common lexical items.
4. Poor Grammar and Punctuation: Errors in grammar and punctuation can detract from the overall quality of the response. Students should proofread their work carefully to ensure accuracy.
5. Failure to Address Both Views: The prompt requires students to discuss both views on happiness. Failing to address both perspectives can result in a lower score for task response.

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