IELTS Writing Task 2: Cyberbullying (Agree Disagree) — Band 6/7/8/9 Model Answers
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The Prompt
Some people believe that cyberbullying is a serious problem that needs to be addressed by governments and schools. Others argue that it is not as significant as other issues and should not be a priority. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Model Answers
Band 6.0 Answer
Cyberbullying is a big problem today. Many people think governments and schools should do something about it. I agree with this because cyberbullying can make people very sad and even hurt themselves. Some people say it is not a big deal, but I disagree because it can cause serious problems.
Scoring Breakdown
- Task Response (TR): Presents a position but lacks development (Band 5)
- Coherence and Cohesion (CC): Simple sentences with basic connectors (Band 6)
- Lexical Resource (LR): Limited vocabulary, some errors (Band 5)
- Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): Frequent errors, simple sentence structures (Band 5)
Band 7.0 Answer
Cyberbullying has become a pervasive issue in modern society. While some argue that it is not as significant as other problems, I firmly believe that governments and schools must take action to address this growing concern. Cyberbullying can have a profound psychological toll on victims, leading to anxiety, depression, and even suicidal thoughts. Furthermore, the anonymity of the internet allows bullies to act without fear of consequences, making it a unique and pressing issue.
Scoring Breakdown
- Task Response (TR): Presents a clear position with some development (Band 7)
- Coherence and Cohesion (CC): Logical organization with clear progression (Band 7)
- Lexical Resource (LR): Sufficient vocabulary with some less common lexis (Band 7)
- Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): Some complex sentences with occasional errors (Band 7)
Band 8.0 Answer
The phenomenon of cyberbullying has reached alarming proportions, necessitating intervention from both governmental and educational institutions. Proponents of the view that it is not a significant issue often underestimate the long-term effects it can have on victims' mental health. Cyberbullying is not merely an isolated incident but a systemic problem that requires a comprehensive approach. Schools should implement strict anti-bullying policies, while governments must enact legislation to hold perpetrators accountable. Additionally, public awareness campaigns can play a pivotal role in educating society about the severe consequences of cyberbullying.
Scoring Breakdown
- Task Response (TR): Presents a clear position with thorough development (Band 8)
- Coherence and Cohesion (CC): Logical organization with clear progression and effective use of cohesive devices (Band 8)
- Lexical Resource (LR): A wide range of vocabulary with precise usage (Band 8)
- Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): Sophisticated sentence structures with minimal errors (Band 8)
Band 9.0 Answer
The escalating prevalence of cyberbullying has sparked a contentious debate regarding its significance and the necessity for intervention. While some dismiss it as a trivial issue, I contend that it represents a critical societal challenge that demands immediate attention from governments and educational institutions. The psychological toll of cyberbullying is well-documented, with victims often experiencing long-term mental health issues such as anxiety, depression, and post-traumatic stress disorder. Furthermore, the digital landscape provides a unique platform for bullies to operate with impunity, exacerbating the problem. To mitigate this issue, a multi-faceted approach is essential. Schools should integrate comprehensive anti-bullying programs into their curricula, while governments must enact and enforce stringent legislation to deter potential offenders. Additionally, fostering a culture of digital citizenship through public awareness campaigns can empower individuals to recognize and report instances of cyberbullying.
Scoring Breakdown
- Task Response (TR): Presents a clear position with thorough development and balanced argument (Band 9)
- Coherence and Cohesion (CC): Logical organization with clear progression and effective use of cohesive devices (Band 9)
- Lexical Resource (LR): A wide range of vocabulary with precise and sophisticated usage (Band 9)
- Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): Sophisticated sentence structures with minimal errors (Band 9)
Vocabulary Highlights
- Pervasive (adjective): Widespread or prevalent. Example: Cyberbullying has become a pervasive issue in modern society.
- Psychological toll (noun phrase): The negative mental health effects. Example: Cyberbullying can have a profound psychological toll on victims.
- Anonymity (noun): The state of being anonymous. Example: The anonymity of the internet allows bullies to act without fear of consequences.
- Profound (adjective): Deep or intense. Example: Cyberbullying can have a profound psychological toll on victims.
- Systemic (adjective): Relating to a system or systems. Example: Cyberbullying is not merely an isolated incident but a systemic problem.
- Comprehensive (adjective): Including all or nearly all elements or aspects of something. Example: Schools should implement a comprehensive anti-bullying policy.
- Enact (verb): To make (a bill or other proposal) law. Example: Governments must enact legislation to hold perpetrators accountable.
- Perpetrators (noun): A person who commits an illegal, immoral, or evil act. Example: Governments must enact legislation to hold perpetrators accountable.
- Impunity (noun): Exemption from punishment or loss. Example: The digital landscape provides a unique platform for bullies to operate with impunity.
- Mitigate (verb): To make (something bad) less severe, serious, or painful. Example: To mitigate this issue, a multi-faceted approach is essential.
- Curricula (noun): The subjects comprising a course of study in a school or college. Example: Schools should integrate comprehensive anti-bullying programs into their curricula.
- Stringent (adjective): Strictly enforced. Example: Governments must enact and enforce stringent legislation to deter potential offenders.
- Deter (verb): To discourage someone from doing something by instilling doubt or fear of the consequences. Example: Governments must enact legislation to deter potential offenders.
- Foster (verb): To encourage the development of something. Example: Fostering a culture of digital citizenship through public awareness campaigns can empower individuals.
- Empower (verb): To give someone the authority or power to do something. Example: Fostering a culture of digital citizenship can empower individuals to recognize and report instances of cyberbullying.
- Digital citizenship (noun phrase): The responsible and appropriate use of technology by users. Example: Fostering a culture of digital citizenship through public awareness campaigns can empower individuals.
- Escalating prevalence (noun phrase): Increasing occurrence or frequency. Example: The escalating prevalence of cyberbullying has sparked a contentious debate.
- Contentious (adjective): Causing or likely to cause disagreement or argument. Example: The escalating prevalence of cyberbullying has sparked a contentious debate.
- Long-term (adjective): Lasting or continuing for a long time. Example: The psychological toll of cyberbullying is well-documented, with victims often experiencing long-term mental health issues.
- Post-traumatic stress disorder (noun): A condition of persistent mental and emotional stress occurring as a result of injury or severe psychological shock. Example: Victims often experiencing long-term mental health issues such as post-traumatic stress disorder.
Common Mistakes
- Weak Thesis Statements: Many students fail to present a clear and strong thesis statement, leading to a lower score in Task Response.
- Lack of Specific Examples: Students often provide general statements without supporting evidence, which weakens their argument.
- Poor Vocabulary Choices: Using basic or repetitive vocabulary can limit the Lexical Resource score.
- Grammatical Errors: Frequent grammatical mistakes can significantly impact the Grammatical Range and Accuracy score.
- Inadequate Coherence and Cohesion: Poor organization and lack of clear progression can result in a lower score for Coherence and Cohesion.
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