IELTS Writing Task 2: Consumerism — Band 7.0 Sample with Full Breakdown

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The Prompt

Many people today pursue a materialistic lifestyle, buying things they don't need. What are the causes of this consumerism? What are its impacts on society?

Sample Answers

Band 6.0 Answer

Score Breakdown:

• Task Response (TR): 5.5 (Presents a position but with limited development)
• Coherence and Cohesion (CC): 6.0 (Logical ideas but some clumsy transitions)
• Lexical Resource (LR): 6.0 (Mixes simple and some less precise vocabulary)
• Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): 6.5 (Frequent errors but some complex sentences)

The causes of consumerism are many. First, advertising makes people want things they don't need. Second, people often buy things to show their status. This has bad impacts. For example, it causes environmental problems because of all the waste. Also, people spend too much money and can become addicted to shopping. In conclusion, consumerism is a serious problem.

Band 7.0 Answer

Score Breakdown:

• Task Response (TR): 7.0 (Presents a clear position with some extensions and supported ideas)
• Coherence and Cohesion (CC): 7.0 (Logically organized with clear progression)
• Lexical Resource (LR): 7.0 (Attempts some sophisticated vocabulary with some errors)
• Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): 7.5 (Uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms with some errors)

Consumerism has become a pervasive issue in modern society, driven by several key factors. One primary cause is the relentless advertising campaigns that create artificial desires. Additionally, the desire to maintain social status often leads individuals to purchase unnecessary items. The impacts of this trend are alarming. Environmentally, the excessive consumption generates substantial waste, contributing to pollution and climate change. Economically, individuals may fall into debt, leading to financial instability. Moreover, the psychological effects include stress and anxiety related to materialistic pursuits. Therefore, addressing consumerism requires collective efforts from governments, businesses, and individuals alike.

Band 8.0 Answer

Score Breakdown:

• Task Response (TR): 8.0 (Presents a clear position with fully developed and supported ideas)
• Coherence and Cohesion (CC): 8.0 (Logically organized with clear progression and effective use of cohesive devices)
• Lexical Resource (LR): 8.5 (Uses a wide range of vocabulary with some sophistication and precision)
• Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): 8.5 (Uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms with frequent error-free sentences)

The rampant consumerism observed in contemporary society stems from a combination of psychological, social, and economic factors. Primarily, the pervasive influence of advertising has created a culture of immediate gratification, where individuals are continually bombarded with messages encouraging them to purchase the latest products. Furthermore, the societal pressure to conform to materialistic standards often leads people to acquire goods beyond their actual needs, as a means of signaling their social status. The consequences of this phenomenon are multifaceted. From an environmental perspective, the increased production and disposal of goods exacerbate issues such as deforestation, pollution, and resource depletion. Economically, the shift towards a consumer-driven model has resulted in increased personal debt and economic instability. Lastly, the psychological implications include heightened stress levels and a diminished sense of well-being. To mitigate these effects, a comprehensive approach involving regulatory measures, corporate responsibility, and individual awareness is essential.

Key Vocabulary

• Pervasive (adj.): widespread and influential
• Example: The pervasive influence of social media on daily life
• Relentless (adj.): unceasing and persistent
• Example: The relentless pursuit of profit by corporations
• Artificial (adj.): not existing in nature; man-made
• Example: Artificial desires created by advertising
• Substantial (adj.): significant in size, amount, or worth
• Example: Substantial waste generated by consumerism
• Exacerbate (v.): to make a problem worse
• Example: Consumerism exacerbates environmental issues
• Multifaceted (adj.): having many different aspects
• Example: The multifaceted consequences of consumerism
• Deforestation (n.): the action of clearing large areas of forest
• Example: Deforestation due to consumer demand
• Psychological (adj.): relating to the mind and emotions
• Example: Psychological implications of consumerism
• Mitigate (v.): to make something less severe or intense
• Example: Mitigate the effects of consumerism
• Regulatory (adj.): relating to rules and regulations
• Example: Regulatory measures to control consumerism
• Corporate (adj.): relating to a large company or group of companies
• Example: Corporate responsibility in consumerism
• Awareness (n.): knowledge or understanding of a situation or subject
• Example: Individual awareness of consumerism's impact

Common Mistakes

1. Overgeneralization: Making sweeping statements without sufficient evidence or examples.
2. Lack of Specificity: Using vague language instead of precise details and clear examples.
3. Poor Organization: Failing to structure the essay logically, leading to a disorganized flow of ideas.
4. Repetition: Repeating the same ideas or vocabulary without sufficient variation.
5. Grammatical Errors: Making frequent grammatical mistakes that detract from the clarity of the essay.

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