IELTS Writing Task 2: Alcohol Consumption – Band 6.5 Sample with Full Breakdown

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Full Prompt

Prompt: Some people believe that the consumption of alcohol should be banned in public places. Do you agree or disagree with this view? Give relevant support for your answer.

Model Answers

Band 6.5 Answer

Response:

In my opinion, the consumption of alcohol should not be banned in public places. There are several reasons why I believe this.

Firstly, banning alcohol in public places would not solve the problem of alcohol abuse. People who want to drink will find a way to do so, whether it is legal or not. For example, if alcohol is banned in parks, people might still drink in their homes or other private places. This would not reduce the overall consumption of alcohol.

Secondly, banning alcohol in public places would limit people's freedom. Adults should have the right to make their own choices about what they consume. If they want to drink alcohol in a park or at a sporting event, they should be allowed to do so as long as they are not causing harm to others.

Finally, banning alcohol in public places would have a negative impact on the economy. Many businesses, such as bars and restaurants, rely on the sale of alcohol to make a profit. If alcohol was banned in public places, these businesses would lose a significant amount of money.

In conclusion, I believe that the consumption of alcohol should not be banned in public places. This would not solve the problem of alcohol abuse, would limit people's freedom, and would have a negative impact on the economy.

Scoring Breakdown:

• Task Response (TR): 6.0 – Presents a clear position but with some development and cohesion.
• Coherence and Cohesion (CC): 6.0 – Uses some cohesive devices but may have some lapses in coherence.
• Lexical Resource (LR): 6.5 – Uses a mix of appropriate and less precise vocabulary.
• Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): 6.5 – Uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms with some errors.

Band 7.0 Answer

Response:

I strongly disagree with the idea that alcohol consumption should be banned in public places. There are several compelling reasons why this would be a bad idea.

To begin with, banning alcohol in public places would be difficult to enforce. People who want to drink will find ways to do so, whether it is legal or not. For instance, if alcohol is banned in parks, people might still drink in their cars or other private places. This would not reduce the overall consumption of alcohol and could lead to more dangerous behavior.

Moreover, banning alcohol in public places would infringe upon people's personal freedoms. Adults should have the right to make their own choices about what they consume. If they want to drink alcohol in a park or at a sporting event, they should be allowed to do so as long as they are not causing harm to others. Banning alcohol would be a form of government overreach and would not be fair to responsible adults.

Additionally, banning alcohol in public places would have a negative impact on the economy. Many businesses, such as bars and restaurants, rely on the sale of alcohol to make a profit. If alcohol was banned in public places, these businesses would lose a significant amount of money, which could lead to job losses and economic hardship.

In conclusion, I believe that the consumption of alcohol should not be banned in public places. This would not solve the problem of alcohol abuse, would limit people's freedom, and would have a negative impact on the economy. Therefore, I strongly disagree with the idea of banning alcohol in public places.

Scoring Breakdown:

• Task Response (TR): 7.0 – Presents a clear and relevant position with some development and cohesion.
• Coherence and Cohesion (CC): 7.0 – Uses a mix of cohesive devices effectively but may have some lapses in coherence.
• Lexical Resource (LR): 7.5 – Uses a range of vocabulary with some less precise or less natural usage.
• Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): 7.5 – Uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms with some errors.

Band 8.0 Answer

Response:

I firmly believe that the consumption of alcohol should not be banned in public places. While I understand the concerns about public safety and health, a ban would not be the most effective solution.

Firstly, banning alcohol in public places would be difficult to enforce. People who want to drink will find ways to do so, whether it is legal or not. For example, if alcohol is banned in parks, people might still drink in their cars or other private places. This would not reduce the overall consumption of alcohol and could lead to more dangerous behavior, such as drinking and driving.

Secondly, a ban on alcohol in public places would infringe upon people's personal freedoms. Adults should have the right to make their own choices about what they consume. If they want to drink alcohol in a park or at a sporting event, they should be allowed to do so as long as they are not causing harm to others. Banning alcohol would be a form of government overreach and would not be fair to responsible adults who enjoy a drink occasionally.

Moreover, banning alcohol in public places would have a negative impact on the economy. Many businesses, such as bars and restaurants, rely on the sale of alcohol to make a profit. If alcohol was banned in public places, these businesses would lose a significant amount of money, which could lead to job losses and economic hardship. Additionally, tourism could be affected, as visitors might choose to go to other destinations where they can enjoy a drink in public.

In conclusion, I believe that the consumption of alcohol should not be banned in public places. A ban would not solve the problem of alcohol abuse, would limit people's freedom, and would have a negative impact on the economy. Therefore, I strongly disagree with the idea of banning alcohol in public places.

Scoring Breakdown:

• Task Response (TR): 8.0 – Presents a clear and relevant position with full development and cohesion.
• Coherence and Cohesion (CC): 8.0 – Uses a mix of cohesive devices effectively and logically.
• Lexical Resource (LR): 8.5 – Uses a range of vocabulary with some less precise or less natural usage.
• Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): 8.5 – Uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms with some errors.

Vocabulary Highlights

1. Consumption (noun): The act of eating or drinking something.

• Example: The consumption of alcohol has increased in recent years.

1. Ban (noun/verb): A formal prohibition or prohibition of something.

• Example: The government is considering a ban on smoking in public places.

1. Enforce (verb): To make sure that a law or rule is obeyed.

• Example: The police are responsible for enforcing the law.

1. Infringe (verb): To violate or break a law or rule.

• Example: The new law infringes upon people's right to free speech.

1. Overreach (noun): The act of going too far or exceeding one's authority.

• Example: The government's decision to ban alcohol in public places is seen as an overreach.

1. Economic hardship (noun): A situation in which a person or business is struggling financially.

• Example: The economic hardship caused by the pandemic has affected many people.

1. Tourism (noun): The activity of traveling for pleasure.

• Example: Tourism is an important source of income for many countries.

1. Occasionally (adverb): Sometimes, but not often.

• Example: I occasionally drink alcohol, but I don't do it often.

1. Prohibition (noun): The act of forbidding something.

• Example: The prohibition of alcohol in the 1920s was a failed experiment.

1. Infringe (verb): To violate or break a law or rule.

• Example: The new law infringes upon people's right to free speech.

1. Overreach (noun): The act of going too far or exceeding one's authority.

• Example: The government's decision to ban alcohol in public places is seen as an overreach.

1. Economic hardship (noun): A situation in which a person or business is struggling financially.

• Example: The economic hardship caused by the pandemic has affected many people.

1. Tourism (noun): The activity of traveling for pleasure.

• Example: Tourism is an important source of income for many countries.

1. Occasionally (adverb): Sometimes, but not often.

• Example: I occasionally drink alcohol, but I don't do it often.

1. Prohibition (noun): The act of forbidding something.

• Example: The prohibition of alcohol in the 1920s was a failed experiment.

Common Mistakes

1. Lack of Clear Position: Some students fail to present a clear position on the issue, making their response unclear and difficult to follow.
2. Insufficient Development: Students often provide a clear position but fail to develop their ideas with relevant examples and explanations.
3. Poor Cohesion and Cohesion: Some responses lack coherence and cohesion, making it difficult for the examiner to follow the student's train of thought.
4. Limited Vocabulary: Students often use a limited range of vocabulary, which can make their response sound repetitive and less engaging.
5. Grammatical Errors: Many students make grammatical errors, which can affect the overall quality of their response.

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