IELTS Writing Task 2: Disability Rights — Band 7.0 Sample with Full Breakdown
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Prompt
Some people believe that governments should invest more in improving infrastructure for people with disabilities, while others argue that this investment would be better spent on other areas. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Band 7.0 Sample Answer
Governments worldwide face the challenge of allocating limited resources to address various societal needs. One contentious issue is whether to prioritize investment in disability infrastructure or divert these funds to other areas.
On one hand, improving infrastructure for people with disabilities is crucial. Many public spaces remain inaccessible, limiting the mobility and independence of disabled individuals. For instance, only 30% of urban buildings in developing countries have ramps or elevators (World Health Organization, 2023). Investing in accessible public transport, ramps, and braille signage can significantly enhance the quality of life for disabled people. Moreover, such investments foster inclusivity, a core value in modern societies.
On the other hand, some argue that funds could be better spent on other pressing issues. Healthcare, education, and employment programs often compete for the same budget. For example, a country with a high illiteracy rate might prioritize building schools over installing elevators in museums. Additionally, critics contend that disability infrastructure benefits only a small portion of the population, whereas healthcare or education initiatives have broader impacts.
In my view, governments should strike a balance between these priorities. While it is undeniable that other areas require attention, neglecting disability infrastructure perpetuates exclusion. A practical approach could involve phased investments, ensuring that both immediate needs and long-term inclusivity are addressed. Governments could also seek private or international funding to share the financial burden.
Scoring Breakdown
Task Response (TR): Band 7
- Presents a clear position throughout the response.
- Extends and supports the main ideas but with some limitations.
- Provides relevant, extended, and supported arguments but occasionally lacks full development.
Coherence and Cohesion (CC): Band 7
- Uses cohesive devices effectively but with some awkwardness.
- Logical organization but may have some unclear progression.
- Paragraphs are appropriately structured but could be more varied.
Lexical Resource (LR): Band 7
- Uses a mix of appropriate and less precise vocabulary.
- Attempts to use less common vocabulary but with occasional errors.
- Uses some collocations and idiomatic language effectively.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): Band 7
- Uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms.
- Makes occasional errors in grammar and punctuation.
- Sentence structure is mostly accurate but with some awkward phrasing.
Vocabulary Highlights
| Word/Expression | Definition | Example Sentence | |-----------------|-------------|------------------| | Infrastructure | The basic physical and organizational structures needed for the operation of a society. | Governments should invest in improving infrastructure for people with disabilities. | | Inclusivity | The practice or policy of providing equal access to opportunities and resources for people who might otherwise be excluded or marginalized. | Investing in accessible public transport fosters inclusivity. | | Contentious | Causing or likely to cause disagreement or argument. | This is a contentious issue that divides public opinion. | | Ramps | Sloping surfaces designed to provide access for wheelchairs and other mobility aids. | Many buildings lack ramps, making them inaccessible to people with disabilities. | | Braille | A system of raised dots that can be read with the fingers by people who are visually impaired. | Braille signage is essential for the independence of visually impaired individuals. | | Phased investments | A gradual approach to funding projects over a period of time. | A phased investment strategy ensures steady progress without overwhelming the budget. | | Perpetuates | To cause something to continue, especially a bad situation or condition. | Neglecting disability infrastructure perpetuates exclusion. | | Competes | Struggles or contends for the same resources or goals. | Healthcare and education programs often compete for the same budget. | | Core value | A fundamental belief or principle that guides behavior and decision-making. | Inclusivity is a core value in modern societies. | | Mobility | The ability to move or be moved freely and easily. | Improving infrastructure enhances the mobility of disabled individuals. | | Independence | Freedom from the control or influence of others; self-reliance. | Accessible public spaces promote independence for people with disabilities. | | Allocating | Distributing resources or tasks in a way that achieves a particular objective. | Governments face the challenge of allocating limited resources wisely. | | Divert | To redirect or turn aside from a particular course or direction. | Some argue that funds could be better spent by diverting them to other areas. | | Enhance | To increase or improve in value, quality, or extent. | Investing in disability infrastructure enhances the quality of life for many. | | Broad impacts | Wide-reaching effects or consequences. | Healthcare initiatives have broad impacts on society. |
Common Mistakes Students Make
- Overgeneralizing: Students often make sweeping statements without providing specific examples or data to support their claims.
- Lack of Balance: Failing to discuss both views equally can lead to a lower Task Response score. Ensure you dedicate roughly equal space to each perspective.
- Poor Vocabulary Choices: Using vague or inappropriate words can weaken your argument. Aim for precise and relevant vocabulary.
- Grammar Errors: Common grammatical mistakes, such as subject-verb agreement errors or incorrect tense usage, can lower your Grammatical Range and Accuracy score.
- Weak Conclusion: A conclusion that merely restates the introduction without adding new insights or summarizing the argument effectively can weaken the overall response.
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